As if this pain he caused can go on and off like a light switch??
Kick this ass to the curb....
I am sorry for everything. Even though I think your decision is wrong and very selfish I will respect it. It was wrong and selfish decisions of mine that got us here. I will forever regret those. You think I cheated you out of your life and yet you are cheating me out of my life plus the ones I love. I feel I no longer have a purpose in life. An opportunity to show you how much love I have for you is all I have asked for. I don't understand why that is asking so much. I never saw how negative my actions would affect others. I hope that you look at that and reconsider your decision that will devastate all of us. I love you and only you. Please have a heart and let us live.
Holy crap?! Did I miss the gaslighting memo or what?
Is it "self intitled assclown wants to make their BS feel like its all their fault day while they continue to ride the sparkle farting unicorn with mrs. glitterpuss" day?
I would break this text down for you but that would be to redundant.
He's not sorry, he's making this your fault and i am sorry he's being such a sissy ass. FTG is right.
I need to remember that!
If your conclusion is different, please give us your thoughts.
Your WH's texts are the EXACT types of words that I used to, and still do actually, get from Sultan (my stbx). And it's ALL bullshit.
Here's a mantra for ya: Your actions, WH, ended the marriage. *I'm* just giving it a proper burial.
Just say that in your mind because he'll just argue with you if you say it to his face.
In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.
If we divorce it will cause tremendous pain just as bad or worse than I caused. I want to fix things so there is no more pain for anyone. You are acting out of anger and negative emotions. Two wrongs don't make a right. Let us correct our marriage instead of throwing it away.
She used to show me some of his emails and they were so similar to this. Basically, he talked down to her, fooled around behind her back, and when she'd threaten to leave - he'd send her this kind of condescending crap. And she's second-guess herself and think she was being the selfish, thoughtless one! Oh it made me so mad...
That was over 3 years ago. She finally ignored those pleas and threats that divorce would ruin everyone, and left his ass. And she's never been happier. Her kids are great, she's engaged to a sweet guy that adores her, and her ex is miserable and is STILL trying to woo her back.
I'm not saying that's how will work, or should work. But he doesn't sound like he has a shred of remorse. Just a fear of abandonment.
He threw away the M. You're simply taking the trash to the curb.
Don't let him guilt trip you. He has brought this into your M, your family. He has risked you through potential STDs, OW that might go Fatal Attraction and more. He's shown your children that a man doesn't honor his vows or treat his wife with respect.
This is him and you have held on much longer than you probably should have.
[This message edited by Holly-Isis at 4:11 PM, June 13th (Thursday)]
❣I hope my issues don't discourage ur healing. I've buried a lot & my WH hasn't done his part in R❣
Slight t/j, but here is part of a letter from my H, if you want to compare. It is truly remorseful. And he has stayed true to his words and has changed.
"... I have failed you as a friend, lover and husband. I have not only let you down but hurt you in a way that I find difficult to comprehend. My life suddenly seems in focus and I hate what I see, the abominable things that I have done, the deceit, the lies.
The last five weeks have been the hardest of my life too. Seeing you in so much pain, and knowing that I was responsible for the damage to our relationship, to my best friend, was too much to bear. The numbness was a defence mechanism to get through that early part, I think. The enduring feelings were those of grief, loss, loneliness and immense shame. I am ashamed that it has taken this crisis for me to face up to the reality of what I have done and what I have become. I am deeply ashamed of everything I have done. I have acted like an animal with no sort of human decency, respect or dignity. I have not treated you with respect. I have not been a faithful, loving husband. I have not attended to you. I have professed love and care for you, and truly meant it, but I have not shown it. These last five weeks I have had to face up to all of that and it has not been easy. I have not been a good person, despite what i've tried to tell myself and you."