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Newest Member: sandihaze (45362)

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User Topic: im not a model
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 10:48 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

we got into an argument yesterday and I told him how I hated the OW and how I wished she would get hit by a bus and the she was ugly as fuck .. well he goes and says well shes not ugly she used to be a model.. great babe thanks you just took my self esteem way out there .. fml
\


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
Kalliopeia
♀ Member
Member # 35053
Default  Posted: 11:13 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She doesn't hold a candle to you. Look what she did.

She is as ugly as a hogs butt wallowing in it's own excrement.


Posts: 478 | Registered: Mar 2012
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 11:15 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

that is true ..


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
JanaGreen
♀ Member
Member # 29341
Default  Posted: 11:54 PM, June 10th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

*snort* YeahI bet she was a model. Why, because she told him so? Whatever. Don't feel inferior to trash.


We're both in our 30s. One awesome 4-year-old daughter.

Posts: 6809 | Registered: Aug 2010 | From: Somewhere in the South
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 12:15 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

that's what I thought too


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
sadtoo
♀ Member
Member # 2027
Default  Posted: 12:22 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

she used to be a model..

Really, Jackass?

Used to be a model....so I take it she FAILED at that too. Way to pick em'
----------------------------
Ignore your idiot WH. He's obviously still got his head up his ass.

[This message edited by sadtoo at 12:23 AM, June 11th (Tuesday)]


It is what it is, not what we hope it can be.

When another woman takes your husband,
sometimes the best thing you can do for
yourself is to LET HER HAVE the worthless
bum.
OC born 2001
Divorced 2003
Remarried 2008 (New Guy)


Posts: 8032 | Registered: Aug 2003 | From: Iowa
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 12:29 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

it just really upsets me because I have given him 5 wonderful kids and I haven't lost all of the baby fat and such from our last baby who is 20 months old .. my self esteem is through the floor right now .. im in tears typing this .. im a really that bad ..


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
sadtoo
♀ Member
Member # 2027
Default  Posted: 12:34 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sweety, don't listen to him. I know it hurts. but really, really, truly, I PROMISE, this had NOTHING to do with you. NOTHING.


It is what it is, not what we hope it can be.

When another woman takes your husband,
sometimes the best thing you can do for
yourself is to LET HER HAVE the worthless
bum.
OC born 2001
Divorced 2003
Remarried 2008 (New Guy)


Posts: 8032 | Registered: Aug 2003 | From: Iowa
IAmPsycho
♀ Member
Member # 39337
Default  Posted: 12:40 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A model for what? My kids have been approached to model for hair places, so I guess they are models too. It's silly! I doubt very much she was a real model. Lots of people throw the used to be a model line.

Second, real beauty is on the inside. It's what makes you a caring mom, and tender hearted spouse. If you sliced her open, she is all black and rotten and oozing sores, and completely ugly. That is the most important part, the insides.


BS (me) 43
WS (him) 48
Married 25 years
Reconciling for 12 years
DDAY 01-16-01
A with my best friend
Lots of children from 24-4 weeks old

Posts: 62 | Registered: May 2013
BeyondBreaking
♀ Member
Member # 38020
Default  Posted: 12:46 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Why would he stand up for her like that? Seriously, even if she was absolutely gorgeous...he is with you and trying to make you feel better. If you say she is ugly, he better damn well agree, and tell anyone and everyone who will listen about what a drooling ogre she is.

What an idiot. Did he also tell you that you look fat in your jeans?


I have been cheated on by 3 different men, and I have more DDays than anyone ever should. I am here, just trying to pickup the pieces.

At least the current man "only" cyber-cheated.

"Love means never having to say you're sorry."


Posts: 840 | Registered: Jan 2013
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 12:49 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

no we have been in R for over 8 months now .. he tells me im beautiful everyday... it just kills me that he would say that she wasn't ugly ..


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
sadtoo
♀ Member
Member # 2027
Default  Posted: 1:02 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If he's anything like my XWH, he probably wasn't sticking up for her, he was probably sticking up for him.

My XWH told me that his AP was "beautiful" too. And went on to say "he'd only been with really good looking women.

Then I met her.

We obviously had a different opinion of "beautiful".

[This message edited by sadtoo at 1:03 AM, June 11th (Tuesday)]


It is what it is, not what we hope it can be.

When another woman takes your husband,
sometimes the best thing you can do for
yourself is to LET HER HAVE the worthless
bum.
OC born 2001
Divorced 2003
Remarried 2008 (New Guy)


Posts: 8032 | Registered: Aug 2003 | From: Iowa
lemony.2008
♀ Member
Member # 20125
Default  Posted: 1:04 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

it just kills me that he would say that she wasn't ugly ..

(((brokensunflower)))

I know what you mean. He used to tell me the OW was like a supermodel, a 9.5/10, for years. I had my doubts but it did hurt a lot. He would even defend her "beauty" in front of our MC. Finally, I found her pictures on FB and let me tell you, she was, at best, average, and I'm being kind. My IC told me he was lying (to me and to himself) to protect his self-image, and that he needed to justify his actions and to make himself feel better. (He needed to convince himself that a "supermodel" would want to be with him, kwim?)

It's all part of their f-ckedupness as supposed to looks. I hope, in time, you can see that it's not about you, at all.

More hugs.


Feel the feelings and drop the story. - Pema Chodron


Posts: 2243 | Registered: Jul 2008 | From: Canada
fraeuken
♀ Member
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 1:10 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Beauty on outside fades. Beauty on the inside stays and will show. I am so sorry he said that.


Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1260 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
PinkJeepLady
♀ Member
Member # 37575
Default  Posted: 1:22 AM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My WH cheated with a bunch of prostitutes so I don't have experience with A's with one specific person, but I just want to agree with the thought he said it for his own ego. Could it be possible it makes it not as disgusting because she was decent looking? Yeah, I wish he would have kept that thought to himself though.
Being a model does not equal being
beautiful, at all. I just had a crazy thought, what if he would have said, she was a cheerleader in high school! Ridiculous!
I am very happy to hear he tells you how beautiful YOU are though! That's great and I hope you believe it!
Don't worry about the "model" comment, I don't think it was meant to cut you down or compare you.
Best wishes to BOTH of you in the R process! Hang in there!


Me: BW-54. Him-FWH 54. DDay June 1st 2012 cheating with prostitutes overseas
R-ing
"Not everything that counts is counted. Not everything that is counted counts." Albert Einstein

Posts: 490 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Out West
NewMom0220
♀ Member
Member # 39036
Default  Posted: 1:46 PM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He is an idiot for saying that to you. She IS UGLY...inside and probably out. They always affair down. Don't let his stupid comment make you feel bad about yourself. He is insensitive and you shouldn't take it personally...he is the jerk who had the messed up thinking in the first place. Who cares if she used to be a model...she's an ugly asshole. You aren't...you are golden. And don't you forget it!!!! I'm sure there would be a line of guys more than willing to tell you just how beautiful you are if you weren't still with him.

Go get your hair and nails done and get a new outfit...don't give him the time of day while you look like a million bucks. Torture him....but read this first. Read this every day until you start feeling better:

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=326449


Me: BS 36
Him: WS 37
14 month old DS
Married 5 years, together 8, DIVORCING!!! (taking forever)
DDay: 3/1/13 (4 Month PA while I was pregnant)
Sometimes all you have to do is forget what you feel and remember what you deserve.

Posts: 374 | Registered: Apr 2013
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 1:52 PM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

thank you all for your kind responses .. I have read them all .. you know what .. im not going to let the word model .. make me feel bad .. im going to hold my head high . take care of my 5 blessings.. and do what I got to do .. fuck her .. im better then that .. what topped it off last night was the fact he wasn't in the door 10 min from coming home from work and he was making love to me .. I least he is in my bed everynight and not hers .. that's one win I got over her.. I sure hope that damn


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
brokensunflower
♀ Member
Member # 38674
Default  Posted: 1:53 PM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

that damn karma bus is going to bite her in the ass .. hes scoreing brownie points with me daily .. like I said before fuck her .. I win ykwim


me 33
him 32
6 wonderful kids 12 yrs 8 yrs 5 yrs 4 yrs and 2 yrs ..and new baby
married 10 years together for 12 yrs
working on R

my give a damn is busted


Posts: 225 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: cold ohio
Ostrich80
Member
Member # 34827
Default  Posted: 2:00 PM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If he's anything like my XWH, he probably wasn't sticking up for her, he was probably sticking up for him
.
This ^^^^^^^^^ well said sadtoo


BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

Posts: 5134 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: midwest
RyeBread
♂ Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, June 11th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

brokensunflower,

I have dated "models". My STBXWW associates with model types also. I don't want to generalize here so I'll try to be careful, but I will say that the ones I know are very shallow and very self-centered. They are not anything remotely close to being a prize. If I decide to enter into another relationship further down the line I will be avoiding them like the plague. The inner ugliness that I see really makes them much less attractive physically. Not sure how that works but it does.

You may not be or ever have been a model but I guarantee you are much much more attractive all around than that shapeshifter ever will be.

I hope your partner can learn a little more tact too. Sorry you had to hear that.


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 1030 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
Topic Posts: 57
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