Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying
Welcome

Forums

Guidelines

Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library

Media

Contact Us
lies
cover
In Association with Amazon.com
Support
Infidelity -
-
like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
[Register]
Newest Member: kassidy (45053)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Quick and Good Update
KBeguile
♂ Member
Member # 38348
Content  Posted: 11:53 PM, June 8th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm very pleased to report that I had a heartfelt and very direct discussion with Heart about our situation. I have gained new insights as to her personal feelings and her position, as well as having a better understanding of myself and my growth since D-Day.

The best part, though, is that I didn't take any of it personally, I didn't start withdrawing, I didn't have a pity party, or any of that other "all about me" crap. It was really a great feeling.


Me: fWS 32
Her: BS 35 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 4yo
M: 7 years
DDays: 2012/11/14, 2013/02/05, 2013/03/09
-
"Everything that happens now is happening 'now.'"
"What happened to 'then'?"
"We passed 'then.'"

Posts: 800 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 12:47 AM, June 9th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That's great to hear, KBeguile. In keeping with the vein of selflessness, how did SHE feel about the talk?

Hopefully a followup with her reveals some kind of relief and comfort.

[This message edited by Jrazz at 2:11 AM, June 9th (Sunday)]


If life is just a series of ridiculous attempts to be alive, you're a hero. - J. Winger

Posts: 17527 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
KBeguile
♂ Member
Member # 38348
Default  Posted: 1:54 AM, June 9th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

According to her, it was comforting, validating (of my Craniorectal Implantation), and insightful (into how I thought pre-D-Day). I think she's relieved to see that I've made visible progress. Hell, she flat-out told me that "(she) didn't need (me)," and I took it far better than I would have pre-D-Day (which would have been to mope, disagree, whine, and so forth).

Upon further investigation/reflection, we have established that the Fog is now only apparently conditional and contained to certain situations, rather than being wide-spread and interfering in everything I try to do; it's pretty well-contained to my NPD tendencies now. I don't try to do as many "mental gymnastics" with regard to my behavior during my As, nor do I attempt to defend myself or the OPs.

I still need to work on NPD-related issues, but I'm getting there.


Me: fWS 32
Her: BS 35 (HeartInADustpan)
DS: 4yo
M: 7 years
DDays: 2012/11/14, 2013/02/05, 2013/03/09
-
"Everything that happens now is happening 'now.'"
"What happened to 'then'?"
"We passed 'then.'"

Posts: 800 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: St. Louis
Jrazz
♀ Guide
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 2:11 AM, June 9th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That sounds like a LOT of work. Hopefully you are experiencing some relief from your new path as well.


If life is just a series of ridiculous attempts to be alive, you're a hero. - J. Winger

Posts: 17527 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:28 AM, June 9th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good job, KBeguile! Keep going .


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 37743 | Registered: Sep 2007
Topic Posts: 5

Return to Forum: Wayward Side Post Reply to this Topic
adultry
Go to :
madness  
© 2002 - 2014 SurvivingInfidelity.com. All Rights Reserved.