I never said the poster's intention was to shame the wife. I actually stated several times that i know the poster's heart was in the right place, i just don't agree with the execution.
The dbag in question was bragging about affairs loudly on a train they were on for several hours, i'm sure he said other things too, about where he worked, or where they were coming from, etc. And she had a picture of him. It would not have been impossible to find this guy.
It sucks that her husband is a douchebag, it sucks that she has to find out in such a public way. My sympathy lies completely with the wife.
Who knows, she may show up here.