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ladyhawk13 (original poster member #25828) posted at 7:22 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
I just posted this question in general and the consensus was that my FWS is spying on me. 
Can someone please tell me what to look for when searching for a spy cam, VAR, spyware on an android (lucid) phone and anything else that may be used to spy on me with? I am beyond pissed! My new laptop that I'm using right now may have spyware on it! I ran a scan from Norton and nothing showed up, but who knows... Although I have NOTHING to hide, I feel violated
simplydevastated ( member #25001) posted at 7:39 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
Although I have NOTHING to hide, I feel violated
I understand this!
As far as a spy cam or VAR. You would need to check in every possible place imaginable. Under the bed, desks, seats in your car, if you can think of it, search it. Spyware on your computer may be a little more tricky. Because they are designed to not be detected. Can you bring it to a computer shop and see if they can find something? I believe you can also get a keylogger on your router and I have no idea how to detect one on there.
For your cell phone, can you back-up your files and apps and restore it to factory settings? That may wipe out any spyware on that. It'll be a PITA but it might be worth it.
Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)
Sharpie4 ( member #35905) posted at 10:50 PM on Wednesday, May 22nd, 2013
You can do a factory reset on your computer. It will wipe any software not provided by the factory.
I still don't know what's going on.
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 12:02 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
It sounds like he has a live cam on you,at least for part of the day. So when you start to look around for the cameras, you need to do it on a day when he is gone for the entire day and start looking early. Im concerned that he will see you clearly searching for something,realize you're onto him,and come home and remove the cameras. The earlier you start,the longer you'll have to look before he gets home from work. The last thing you want to do is tip him off that you're suspicious. He will just remove the cams,wait awhile,and then put them back once he feels safe.
[This message edited by confused615 at 6:03 AM, May 23rd (Thursday)]
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
Sharpie4 ( member #35905) posted at 2:19 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
When I was searching for my DH's 2nd phone I used the spring cleaning as a cover to go through everything. Don some yellow kitchen gloves and grab a dust cloth and go to town.
I still don't know what's going on.
Unagie ( member #37091) posted at 2:43 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
For your laptop, if the factory reset is something you don't want to do, get Spybot S&D (search and destroy) and also get avg free virus scan. I run both of these and they should work and are also totally free.
I also like the spring cleaning idea. Go to town and get to searching. Do a little research on what spycams can look like, has he bought anything new into the house recently? anything directed at the placed he mentions that he shouldn't know about. What are the rooms you're having these convos in that he is mentioning? Start there and look for VAR's and cameras.
This is just creepy.
npain ( member #33539) posted at 5:37 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
STBX was spying on me, I managed to find most of his spy gear. Check on Ebay for a hidden camera detector. They are supposed to pick up the infra-red beams that the cameras send out. And keep on searching manually too becuase the decector might not find everything.
S, Filed 4/17/14--YAY, ME!!
avicarswife ( member #35799) posted at 6:35 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
Yes it does sound like he is spying. As he rings shortly after you wake, stay in the bedroom and see if he still rings. Then you will know if a camera is most likely in your room.
Early on when I was checking up on WS a lot I found some software that meant I could log one from work and spy via the webcam on his laptop.
After that I stuck a post-it note over the camera on mine. It made me paranoid how easy it is.
Spybubble can be downloaded onto android phones - you can read texts, see a call log, see any photos taken with the camera and get gps on the basic plan. If you upgrade you can even listen in on conversations and have enviroment listening.
It is easy to download on a phone - you only need a few minutes with the phone. A factory reset will get rid of it but if you don't want to do that and think it is on your phone pm me. I will send you a copy of the instructions on how to uninstall it - I have an account 
On D-day:BS 46 (me)WH 50
Toasted22M 26 yrs,3 kids (16-24) at discovery. D-Days 2012 23-24 May + TT D-Day 2013 12 Apr
mOW #1 EA yrs PA Feb 2009-end 2011
mOW #2 EA months PA 4 mths 2010
mOW#3 PA once
2022 Separated
ladyhawk13 (original poster member #25828) posted at 7:35 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
Thank you to all that have given your help and advice. I think that he has put something on my phone I always have it with me and some of my conversations are away from home and yet he will mention some of what I say in those conversations! I have yet to find any other spyware, but I would not be surprised if there isn't more
debbysbaby ( member #32962) posted at 7:42 PM on Thursday, May 23rd, 2013
Time to reset that phone!
-betrayed almost my whole almost 15 yr marriage
-divorced since 2004
Take2 ( member #23890) posted at 11:23 AM on Friday, May 24th, 2013
by what means do you access SI?
just a thought...
[This message edited by Take2 at 8:10 AM, May 24th (Friday)]
"We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us." Joseph Campbell...So, If fear was not a factor - what would you do?
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