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Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: It's been a while...
knightsbff
♀ Member
Member # 36853
Default  Posted: 12:35 AM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read... Then I think... Then I think of what I might post as a response or a thread then I think myself out of it. I'm all stuck inside my head lately.

This is a big change for me. I have always been one to express too much and think too little. This could be a good change. I really hope it isn't medication driven.

I am possibly/probably bipolar and the medications are not my favorite thing. I am being a cooperative and compliant patient as a part of being safe and healthy. This is also new (post d-day). Admitting that the rules do in fact apply to me and that I might really need meds or treatment... new... I have even been compliant with my asthma and other medical treatments.

Accepting that I can really be (am) in need of help physically or mentally has been huge. Humbling. Growth.

I'm sorry for rambling. I think what I want to know is has it been part of the process for other waywards to turn the focus so inward that they get trapped inside for a bit?

I haven't lost touch with my BH. I think communication between us has been very good. I just find myself thinking about threads or posts for so long that the moment for posting is really past.


FWW 40's
D-day August 27, 2012
3 kids and 2 dogs

Posts: 1380 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: Deep South, USA
authenticnow
♀ Moderator
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:02 AM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's okay not to post. Use SI however it works for you.

I think what I want to know is has it been part of the process for other waywards to turn the focus so inward that they get trapped inside for a bit?
For me, yes. I think it's our way of processing. When I got out of that, it was like I had no peripheral vision. My eye was on the prize (the marriage). I put aside friends, all outside stuff, built the walls around the marriage, and dug in.
Accepting that I can really be (am) in need of help physically or mentally has been huge. Humbling. Growth.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 36515 | Registered: Sep 2007
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 6:56 PM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi knights,

I'm glad you are healing some. Keep up the work on that.

I get trapped inside myself at times, usually during stress build-up from work, volunteer stuff, kids, house stuff, and, oh yeah, my BW (love ya, hon). And if anyone gets a prize for not being able to weigh in on some things in a timely fashion, I'd be in the running...but what gets me is how much I focus on others on SI. It is easy to loose yourself sometimes. The good thing is that a lot of the stuff that I post, which is to others, actually comes around to my own situation and my own work. Selfish maybe...lot's of I's amd me's and IMO's and such, but it seems to work.

Take what you need and leave the rest. If thinking about things for a long time, past the point of being pertinent, then maybe thinking about it is what you need to do right now. As things even out, you may find yourself not getting so bogged down within yourself and being able to get the thoughts onto the screen again.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6092 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 7:15 PM, April 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi,

Nice to see you again.

To answer your question, yes, this happened to me a lot in the beginning. I was not a heavy poster in the beginning. I thought a lot about what I read. I was in my head a lot!!

I also feel that helped me have a lot of lightbulb moments as well. So I guess the question is, Is what your reading helping you?


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4476 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
Topic Posts: 4

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