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Newest Member: jdubb80 (44703)

New Beginnings Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Cosmetic surgery?
nolight
♀ Member
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 7:46 AM, February 13th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Has anyone else considered it after giving yourself enough time to grieve your relationship and move forward with life?

I've got a consult with a surgeon coming up soon for revision rhinoplasty (initial was done almost 10 years ago I still am not happy!) and chin augmentation. I am anticipating that it will cost about $18 000 which I have in the bank and have just bought all new furniture so that's my savings gone but I think I ok with that.

I had breast augmentaion a few years ago and am really happy and far more confidant.

I think I have given myself enough time that its not a reaction to everything that happened, if anyone else has done the same would love to know how it shaped your new beginning.


Posts: 476 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
Newlease
♀ Member
Member # 7767
Default  Posted: 9:01 AM, February 13th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I personally couldn't risk my savings in that way. But I can't seem to get my savings off the ground at all, so I'm in a completely different place.

There are some things about my body that I'm not happy with and if I had the money, (like if I won the lottery) I would consider surgery.

You need to make yourself happy, but be sure you are willing to risk flying without the safety of your savings.

NL


Even if you can't control the world around you, you are still the master of your own soul.

Posts: 7676 | Registered: Aug 2005
stillstrong
♀ Member
Member # 36144
Default  Posted: 10:37 AM, February 13th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If you had never considered cosmetic surgery before, I'd say wait a while longer.
But since you have had 2 previous cosmetic procedures and your desire to do this rhinoplastly pre-dates the end of your relationship
, then absolutely.
Just please don't completely clean out your savings. Make sure this is a smart financial decision, as well as emotional.

Edited to change D to end of relationship

[This message edited by stillstrong at 10:38 AM, February 13th (Wednesday)]


Me BS 47
Him WS 51
DDay LTA Feb 21, 2006
R until DDay 2EA's 1/31/12 ONS 2/5/12 Broken NC 7/12/12
Moved out 9/12
Legally Separated 3/13


Posts: 848 | Registered: Jul 2012
damncutekitty
♀ Member
Member # 5929
Default  Posted: 12:31 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have been working on weight loss for over a year. I'm down nearly 70 pounds and aiming to lose at least 100 total.

I am planning on rewarding myself with some surgery if I can keep the weight off for a few years. I am 34 now... so maybe for my 40th birthday?


Keep calm and carry on.

Posts: 49468 | Registered: Nov 2004 | From: Minneapolis
Waiting@home
♀ Member
Member # 24792
Default  Posted: 4:06 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, if you are unhappy and you think this will make you feel more confident, then it will probably change your outlook and therefore your life. Like the others, I am not feeling too great with wiping out all your savings. Maybe you can get a payment plan? I assume that you have a good job and that is why you are unconcerned monetarily, but I still feel that you may need a buffer of a few months salary, just in case. That being said, I did read that attractive people generally make more money and are better received. Still it seems that for the most part, people do not see in us the flaws that we so readily notice of ourselves. Ask yourself if you'd rather have a new face or a great trip, a new car, or perhaps return to school.

I haven't done any post D surgery; however, I have had my nose worked on twice. The first time, was way back in 1978, when I was 18. The doctor was new and became more of a breast doctor-- who knew what to ask back then? I had such a deviated septum that I mostly breathed through my mouth and as a result, my gums were always swollen. Pretty, right? (I didn't even realize that my gums were about to get better looking!) After the surgery, I could breath better, but it wasn't wonderful. Around 1996, I noticed that only one side of my nose worked at all, when my husband started to complain about my use of nasal spray each night before bed. I had a second surgery with a plastic surgeon who came from a background of nasal surgeries to restore breathing. He changed my life! He removed a part of the turbinates, which helped reduce my allergies. I also had nasal windows added and that cleared up my chronic drainage. I am VERY happy that I had the second surgery. Does my nose look perfect? Nope, never will. It's still crooked, but so when I pose for the camera, I make sure to get my good side. Men never notice this flaw, because they are busy noticing my smile instead. Once I stupidly point out this facial flaw, they are kind enough to say they like the character it gives my face. I noticed that Cameron Diaz has character in the form of a crooked nose, so I don't think we need to be "perfect". I will add, that the nose I had at 18 held me back. I'm glad I did this.


BS-me
DD1 Dec 13, 2008 EA
DD2 April 15, 2009 EA
M 17 yrs
Divorced the WXH


Posts: 321 | Registered: Jul 2009
nolight
♀ Member
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 7:31 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you all so much for your replies and concern. I have a stable well paying job, my car is two years old and I've just finished my masters degree and am going on an overseas trip in two weeks so I'm not too concerned about the money aspect. (I sound a bit like I'm bragging, I'm not I grew up in foster care and have worked my butt off to get where I am by 32)

All I really want is a family that will take up my earnings but until they (hopefully) come along I guess I may as well spend it while I can!

Incidentally I'm travelling to the states for my holiday, I know most of you are from there, I can't wait to visit your country!


Posts: 476 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
hurtinky
♀ Member
Member # 26152
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had eye lid surgery a year ago. I had droopy eyelids. My eyebrows were uneven also. The surgeon tightened up the eyelids, and evened up my brows. She also did some liposuction around my eyes.

I knew I wanted to do it but I had no idea just how dramatic the difference would be. It took ten years off of me! I think my eyes are gorgeous now.

It was really a huge thing for me. I feel so much better about myself.


Me --> BS
D-Day 10-1988
D-Day 9-12-2005
S 9-13-2005
D 3-6-12



Posts: 1500 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: Kentucky
Helen of Troy
♀ Member
Member # 26419
Default  Posted: 8:35 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No, but if I had the money I'd get a boob job! (hey thisfrom former granola type sah mom)

If you want it, do it.
It's your money and your life.


Posts: 4693 | Registered: Dec 2009
risingfromashes
♀ Member
Member # 3903
Default  Posted: 8:51 AM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a tummy tuck. After 3 c-sections, huge babies, and additional abdominal surgery things were pretty much flapping in the breeze. I already had scars so that was not a big deal. I am happy with the results.


There is life on the other side of hell.

Posts: 1619 | Registered: Mar 2004
GabyBaby
♀ Member
Member # 26928
Default  Posted: 1:31 PM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am planning on rewarding myself with some surgery if I can keep the weight off for a few years.
I lost almost half my body weight (approx 140lbs) about 11 years ago. I had a tummy tuck and love, love, LOVE it.
I've since gained back about 20lbs, but my stomach still looks flat in clothing, though I can tell I'm wider and a bit rounder than I was before.

I'm 40 now and have toyed with the idea of having my rear lifted...but I'll probaby pass. Hubby isn't complaining and I'm not too keen on going under the knife again.


Me - 40s
SorryInSac - WH#2 - 40s. DDay 7/12/14
Married 4, together 7yrs total
Status - R looks possible..

DD(21), DS(18, PDD-NOS)
6 Furkids

WXH (serial cheater, 12+ OW)
Legally married 18yrs, together 16.5yrs

I edit often for clarity.


Posts: 6357 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: California
ISPIFFD
♀ Member
Member # 26367
Default  Posted: 1:47 PM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had breast aug surgery a few years ago, and overall I'm happy with it -- happier with it than I was without it, but the doc went a bit overboard, if you get my drift. I found out after the fact that he's known for that... I wish I'd known before hand. If/when it comes time to redo the work (because they apparently only last 10-15 years), I plan to go down a size or two and have some nip/tuck work done to make things look more like what I wanted.

Anyway, I'd very very much like to get eyelid surgery done. I have my daddy's big, puffy eyelids and every time I look in the mirror, that's all I see -- a face with no eyes and big, puffy eyelids I've heard a number of people say that getting that taken care of took about 10 years off their appearance. That sounds good!

I do believe there are medical payment plans available - I remember seeing the brochures - and they come with very little or no interest, so as long as you qualify and make the payments, it's a pretty good way of not having to go through all your savings in one lump.


Me: BW (54)
Him: WH (61)
7/14/11 - Divorced

Posts: 1814 | Registered: Nov 2009 | From: another world
newnormal
♀ Member
Member # 21925
Default  Posted: 4:29 PM, February 14th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I had a mommy make over. It was the first money I ever spent on myself! I had lost weight and had big babies so I love the tummy tuck. But with respect to the breast lift/aug, I told my plastic surgeon that I did not stutter when I asked for full C small DDD


BS 43 (me)
FWH 48
D-day 9/07

Dont retreat, reload.
"Pull that knife out of your back - and sever the fuel line to that bus you got thrown under" Bufffalo


Posts: 1033 | Registered: Dec 2008
nolight
♀ Member
Member # 32785
Default  Posted: 12:48 PM, March 20th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well it's booked for May, it cost $20 000 but I think I will consider it money well spent.

Posts: 476 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: Hawaii
stillstrong
♀ Member
Member # 36144
Default  Posted: 3:10 PM, March 20th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations! That's very exciting.


Me BS 47
Him WS 51
DDay LTA Feb 21, 2006
R until DDay 2EA's 1/31/12 ONS 2/5/12 Broken NC 7/12/12
Moved out 9/12
Legally Separated 3/13


Posts: 848 | Registered: Jul 2012
Meadhbh
♀ Member
Member # 23087
Default  Posted: 10:02 PM, March 20th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh my! If I had the money, I would get everything jacked back up!


"Sometimes your knight in shining armor is just an idiot in tin foil."

Posts: 1074 | Registered: Mar 2009 | From: Middle USA
persevere
♀ Member
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 10:16 PM, March 20th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would love to do something - tummy tuck or breast lift etc. but I just can't justify emptying my savings...

This post is giving me food for thought though...


Me: BW-44
Him: XWH-44
Together 9 yrs
DDays: 1/10/2011
Status: Divorced 4/27/11

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K. Rowling


Posts: 4458 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: Texas
exhausted lady
♀ Member
Member # 30217
Default  Posted: 11:42 PM, March 20th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If I had the $$$ I would have a tummy tuck in a New York minute. After a 9 lb daughter, and 2 abdominal surgeries, a billion crunches is not going to solve the problem.

I say, if you got the money, and it will make you feel more confident....go for it!


Sometimes the hardest part of finally seeing through someone is accepting what you see...

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to
change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
-Reinhold Neibuhr


Posts: 3168 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: Colorado
stronger08
♂ Member
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 3:09 AM, March 21st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If it brings you happiness and you can afford it. Good for you. My sister lost weight and had her stomach done. She also treated herself to Botox and some other facial shit done. She looks good and her confidence is way up there. Last week was my lady friends birthday. She also happens to be a very close friend of my sister. We chipped in and got her some botox as shes been complaining of the lines on her face and forehead. She is estatic. Its only been a week and its not taken full effect yet and I can notice the difference already. Took about 5 years off her face. If your not too shy Id like to see a pic of the finished product when and if your ready. Good luck.


You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 5604 | Registered: Nov 2007
hexed
♀ Member
Member # 19258
Default  Posted: 8:31 AM, March 21st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I want a boob lift in the worst way. I will probably do it in a few years. No guilt about that at all.

I think its just fine if you aren't going overboard with it.

Someday I can see having my eyelids done. My SO hates this idea - he says then I wouldn't look like me anymore. I love that he feels that way. I still think I would get that done.


But that's just a lot of water
Underneath a bridge I burned
And there's no use in backtracking
Around corners I have turned

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves - regret for the past and fear of the future.” -foulton oursler


Posts: 8439 | Registered: Apr 2008
Survivor3512
♀ Member
Member # 37946
Default  Posted: 10:17 AM, March 22nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I say if you can afford it and it will make you feel better about yourself, then go for it!

I'm sitting in the waiting room right now to get a tummy tuck! I've wanted one for years- things were just not the same after my second ds was born. But when I was married, I could never justify the expense. I saved my money so we could buy or do something together. So, now that I'm divorced, I'm finally doing what I want to do. I'm nervous and excited. I can't wait til it's all done!!!


Me (BS)- 36
Divorced
----------------------------------------------------------
Just keep swimming, just keep swimming- Dorie

Posts: 293 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: Southeastern U.S.
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