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Newest Member: womanoflight (43210)

I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Betrayed Men- Part 9
5454real
♂ Member
Member # 37455
Default  Posted: 8:41 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awesome, happy birthday.

Yep, you're the answer. Now what was the question?


BH 50, WW 41
DS 23(Mine),SD 21,SS 19(Hers),DS 8 Ours, DGS 2 1/2
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
Married 10yrs
“I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.”
― Sophocles, Antigone

Posts: 2068 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
stilllovingher
♂ Member
Member # 29959
Default  Posted: 9:03 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, WAL and son!

You are a true gift the BH's here, as well as manyany others in your life im sure.


The only difference between a butt kisser and a brown noser is depth perception.
I'm sure WAL would agree.

Posts: 2385 | Registered: Oct 2010 | From: still BFE, but now BFE, CA
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 9:47 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You guys are awesome. Thanks for making me feel so appreciated on my b-day!

And I dig the fact that so many of you got the Douglas Adams reference. I posted something similar on my Facebook, and my mom was all like "Oh, honey. 42 just means you're getting older. There are many more questions than answers ahead, I'm afraid, but I love you just how you are."

I love my mom. There's no way to explain the Hitchhiker's reference without making it awkward, so I'm just going to take it like a virtual mom-hug and hope that no one decides to set her straight.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 9:47 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Best. Damn. Birthday. Cake. Ever!

Happy Birthday wal!

I was pushing for a menz only gtg at the beach. Outer Banks is just about the best East coast beach there is.
Fishing.
Beers.
Bikinis.
Beers.
& stuff.
Not a Vegas-type guy.
Not that I'd prevent you guys from going, but...ah hell
"I been to a town."

In terms of logistics, speaking for myself, I need time to plan & save. It would seem wise to sandwich it around a holiday, & maybe grab an extra day or two...like turning Labor Day into a 4-5 day gig. IDK yet...

Next "beach" window would be Memorial Day 2014...
I'm thinking of footing the bill for a beach house for x # of days...right on the beach.
Mull it over guys.

PS
The last several pages of the thread have been some of the best - great stuff guys!


Posts: 6013 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Ascendant
♂ Member
Member # 38303
Default  Posted: 9:48 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So how many of your WWs OM were complete losers?
My WWs OM1 has never been able to hold down a job...

This ^^^ right here. OM in my wife's A was a former co-worker of 7+ years...the ENTIRE time I knew him, from when he was about 25 to 33, he spent his working hours complaining about his job, and how he's going to look for a new one, and how he needed to go back to school, etc., while spending the rest of his waking hours baked on weed, playing video games, and not paying his bills. In the time that I've known him, he's had 3 different apartments, and had cable for about 3 months....because he signs up, gets the first month, and is such a fucktard he never pays the bill. Doesn't own a car, takes the bus everywhere.

He's one of those guys that is actually fairly intelligent (in a book-read sort of way), and has a good sense of humor, but will never get out of his own fucking way to accomplish anything. Zero motivation, zero ambition. Always takes the path of least resistance.

wincing_at_light-
Went fine, thanks for asking. As smooth as can be expected 2 1/2 months out from DDay, I'd guess. Broke out some of her old A Yahoo! chat transcripts, and we worked through them, line-by-line...so I feel like I can put them to bed mentally. The only downside is that I got a little vent-y near the end, and starting sharing the multitude of OM revenge fantasies with the wifey. She mayyyyyyy be worried I'm going to kill her in her sleep now, because in her mind I have just as much reason to be angry at her. Which is true, except that I'm around to see her working on her shit, and to hear her apologize daily, while that fucker runs around clapping himself on the back. As angry as I am at OM, if he even had the balls to fire off a text that was as simple as "I'm sorry", 90% of the anger would dissipate. But hey, she asked, "What's going on in that head of yours, [FP]?"...so, I told her.

Oh, and happy birthday!

[This message edited by FacePunched at 9:49 AM, March 19th (Tuesday)]


“Anyone who has a continuous smile on his face conceals a toughness that is almost frightening.”

Posts: 1604 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Illinois
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 9:58 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Happy B Day WAL! It might have been more cryptic if you put "So long and thanks for the fish" on FB. Just keep your towel handy.


Married: 16 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3303 | Registered: Dec 2011
MyRevelation
♂ Member
Member # 38243
Default  Posted: 10:02 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Since I'm turning 42 today, does that mean I'm now the answer to life, the universe, and everything?

Happy Birthday, WAL ... although I've got a 10 year head start on you ... and I've earned every wrinkle and gray hair that comes with it.

As you can see, I've recently found my way to SI, but some of the others may have ran across me on other forums.

FWIW, I really like this thread.

[This message edited by MyRevelation at 10:05 AM, March 19th (Tuesday)]


Posts: 63 | Registered: Jan 2013
spareparts
♂ Member
Member # 33434
Default  Posted: 10:22 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Terrible that few people got the Douglas Adams reference, though not as suprising as I'd think. When the BBC released a Dirk Gently TV series and I asked a few people if they watched it, no one had ever even heard of him.

Back to trynhard just to clarify

Spareparts.. It would idiotic for me to say that there are not woman who are in an endless search for male approval. Let’s face it, they are out there. But that woman who is "that” selfish, wondering why no man is available?? A good man picks that out before a relationship starts. I refuse to believe you are the “complete” opposite of doing those things on that list. No woman would ever submit to you. I am sure you meant that in a different way. “I let “things go” in the name of compromise.” Of course, you can be in a relationship. Sometimes values or needs are mismatched and compromise is a must. “I wasn't able to concentrate 100% of my spare time on her” I didn’t say that. A woman needs her time and a man needs his time. If you did many of those things I listed all of the time, then you would be one of those “clingy” men that woman hate.

You are right had my XWW been that selfish at the start of our relationship then I would've picked up on it and bailed years ago, she changed after her mother died thats when the selfish streak started. Though at what time is it then appropriate to lay down your boundaries over your greiving wife? 6 months? 12 months? 18 Months? Though then as my mother died 18 months after her mother, things just got worse but suprisingly I had other things on my mind than being this super strong person in your list. 18 months after that just as things were settling down for me, my XWW started up her A. Despite me offering her those chances she continued her selfish behaviour and as such is now my X WW. So whilst I may not be the complete opposite of your list I certainly fulfilled most of the roles and don't consider myself one of those "clingy" men.

All that is irrelevant though as all I am saying is that there is no full list or rules that we can appear to follow to stop our wifes from doing what the hell they like, and even sometimes the seemingly healthy ones can go through a traumatic event that changes their personality, or rather enhances the negatives and creates a situation where we are the collateral damage. The upshot is I now get to be me, and live my life for me rather than anyone else (Well my kids obviously but thats a fathers job surely!)

Anyway sorry I get a bit worked up these days, the media, womens magazines and films etc portraying WW's as the neglected woman whose needs were going unmet. Its balls, if I wasn't meeting my XWW's needs its because she wasn't letting me know where I was "failing". Though as has already been said, it is more likely to be that she had far less invested in the M and family than I did and as such was easier for her to walk away.

SP


Posts: 515 | Registered: Sep 2011
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 10:34 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As you can see, I've recently found my way to SI, but some of the others may have ran across me on other forums.

I actually do know you from another forum -- one where, shall we say, strong male voices stopped being appreciated. You know me there by a different name.

Glad to see you made the trek over, MyRev. You've got a ton of insight and experience the guys new to this process can benefit from.

I was pushing for a menz only gtg at the beach.

I could get behind this. I threw out Vegas because that seems to be what everybody wants to do. I've never had a desire to visit there, myself -- except maybe to see the Hoover Dam and see how realistic Fallout: New Vegas was.

It might have been more cryptic if you put "So long and thanks for the fish"

Ha! No doubt, T.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
MyRevelation
♂ Member
Member # 38243
Default  Posted: 10:39 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I actually do know you from another forum -- one where, shall we say, strong male voices stopped being appreciated. You know me there by a different name

Yeah, I know ... you were the one who kind of pointed me this way in a PM discussing how the strong male voices were being muzzled on that site.

So now you've got the dubious distinction of being "responsible" for me being here to answer for.


Posts: 63 | Registered: Jan 2013
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 10:41 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Outer Banks is just about the best East coast beach there is.

Save me a room JJ! Cold beer and hopefully the blues will be running...or at least be able to pull in a mess of spot and croaker!


Married: 16 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3303 | Registered: Dec 2011
Long Gone
♂ Member
Member # 32587
Default  Posted: 11:24 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WAL

Skid Row Opened for GNR in Summer of 91....I saw them in Mannheim, Ger.....


D-Day 11/26/10

Posts: 753 | Registered: Jun 2011
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 11:52 AM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Skid Row Opened for GNR in Summer of 91

Did they suck live for you? They sounded horrible when I saw them. I don't really remember the '89 version (probably opening for Bon Jovi or something, would've been Market Square Arena in Indianapolis, I guess), but the later ones were at one of those outdoor arenas. I remember being appalled at how terrible they were, and I was a *huge* fan of _Slave to the Grind_ (which was, in many ways, a better album than Tesla's _Psychotic Supper_ from the same time period, though it pains me to say that).

GNR was great, but I suppose anything would be great after you'd been made to sit in the dark for two hours watching pieces of Evil Dead and Evil Dead II while waiting for the lead singer to sober up enough to perform.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
wonderingbull
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Member # 14833
Default  Posted: 12:03 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Happy Birthday WAL!

jj... I'd be interested in a beach outting...

WB


The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time...

James Taylor


Posts: 5893 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: A better place
aesir
♂ Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 12:06 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Okay, I am thinking metal festival myself.


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
RyeBread
♂ Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 12:22 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Okay, I am thinking metal festival myself.

I hope that includes "real" metal like Iron Maiden, Anthrax, and Motorhead.


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 957 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
aesir
♂ Member
Member # 17210
Default  Posted: 12:33 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, I sure aint gonna travel for a Poison reunion.

|m|


Your mileage may vary... in accordance with the prophecy.

Do not back up. Severe tire damage.


Posts: 14924 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: Winnipeg
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 1:11 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Done and DONE...
Ok, beach.

Consider timing, logistics, etc. & we can pick.

Potential times:
- Memorial Day, 5/27, a Monday
- July 4th - a Thurs.
- Labor Day - Sept. 2 - Mon.

Next year, 2014?
Memorial Day...


Posts: 6013 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
StillGoing
♂ Member
Member # 28571
Default  Posted: 1:11 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So how many of your WWs OM were complete losers?

My WWs OM1 has never been able to hold down a job, went through bankruptcy while they were together, has an estranged relationship with his family and can't even run faster than an 11 minute mile. While I could stand to do more exercise now myself I know I can run way faster than that and hit a perfect 10 on all the other items easily when compared to this loser.

What is it that they could possibly even see in these people that was attractive?

lol not sure I can run an 11 minute mile today.

Yeah, he was a loser. She's embarrassed now. I've ranted now and then about it, we even stopped at a convenience store OTW home from Disney that he had got fired from. She triggered, I didn't really care. Disney was fucking AWESOME.

It doesn't really matter if they're losers or not. OM had a bigger dick. Bothered me a lot for awhile, don't care so much anymore. I don't care if the OM was staggeringly wealthy and knocked together houses for hobos in his spare time, he's still a piece of shit hypocrite. The few men who look at the shit they do and work to become better men notwithstanding, OM are not men, just a gaggle of dick drillers looking for oil at any cost.

As for a metal festival I won't pay money for a Maiden show again while Dickenson is still up there choking out nightmarish versions of beloved tunes and sounding like someone beating a half drowned cat against a toaster and I love Anthrax but they have their members on a revolving door schedule anymore.

I got to see Motorhead & Dio play years ago. Was fucking epic. Lemmy probably sounds the same.

in 09 we went to see a bunch of hair bands (this was during her A by then but w/e), Ratt, Extreme and Twisted Sister were awesome but Dokken.. man they looked like they wanted to boo themselves off stage. They were bad. Bad bad, not good bad.


“Fate is a fickle bitch who dotes on irony.”

Posts: 7109 | Registered: May 2010 | From: USA
RyeBread
♂ Member
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, March 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

True True, they are up there in age and won't be the same as back in the "good ol days".

I just can't abide any band that wears makeup as a prop. Just bugs the hell out of me, always has. It's good for a laugh though if you google some of the old glam band pics.


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 957 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
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