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Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: If You Love Two People...
wert
♂ Member
Member # 34478
Default  Posted: 8:41 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Love is working all hours to provide for us. Love is making sacrifices for our family. Love is holding my hand while I puke my guts out. Love is being by my side thru 2 pregnancies. One, uneventful the other, stressed with suicidal tendencies and almost losing the baby during delivery. Love is sitting in the floor with me while I suffered a miscarriage. Love is late bills, flat tires, dirty laundry, morning breath and sleepy eyes, boring household chores, weeding the garden, bedtime stories, kids sneaking in our room during a thunderstorm, passing kisses in the hallway, burnt dinners and desserts that flopped.

Aubrie84 - This is what it is about. I appreciate what others have said about you truly getting it. But this list goes beyond that. It defined what M and love are for me. I wanted to be married so I could share my life with someone who shared the same sense of value of family, trust and dedication. Practical loyalty explains it for me.

Thank you.

[This message edited by wert at 8:41 AM, March 30th (Friday)]



Posts: 1406 | Registered: Jan 2012
Offhispedestal
♀ Member
Member # 32528
Default  Posted: 8:46 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I LOVE this post! That is what true love really is! I love it!!! I dont think I have emailed my H things from SI.
But this an exception!

Thank you!


ME-44
WH-45
Married 24


2Beautiful daughters
DD 6/26/10 (he broke down & confessed)
DD#2 3/14/11 H in OW's car
TT 7/1/11 (NC broken, through emails)

In R


Posts: 629 | Registered: Jun 2011
DixieD
♀ Member
Member # 33457
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well said Aubrie. You've come a long way

side note -- some of the quotes on pinerest are


Growing forward

Posts: 1737 | Registered: Sep 2011
Decorative
♀ Member
Member # 33196
Default  Posted: 9:02 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That made me cry. Well done, Aubrie.


Me, BW 40
Him, FWH 39
LTA, final DDay 3.10
Happy. And amazed.
In recovery

Posts: 747 | Registered: Aug 2011
helpemegetoverit
♀ Member
Member # 30242
Default  Posted: 9:06 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well said Aubrie. You've come a long way
side note -- some of the quotes on pinerest are

I agree - excellent post Aubrie!

I have a love/hate relationship with Pinterest. I almost want to create a 'things I hate or disagree with' board :-). There is another quote on there...I can't remember it and of course today is the first day it's not in the 'most popular section' but it is something about how old people stayed married because they fixed their problems. ANYONE who has talked to an older woman (especially a woman, although I am sure it is true for both parties) will not usually say that. They will say that people didn't get divorced back then, so they just sucked it up. I work with a lot of older people and have over the years I have been working and most are jealous that divorce is actually an option for those in my generation. That it isn't shunned upon, etc.

Anyway, there are a lot of things on Pinterest that make no sense, I loved your post here and using it to relate to your progress.


Me: WW
Him: BH

"You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world...but you do have some say in who hurts you."
John Green


Posts: 882 | Registered: Nov 2010
Decorative
♀ Member
Member # 33196
Default  Posted: 9:30 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am going to make " schmaltzy untrue crap" board on Pinterest. great idea!! LOL


Me, BW 40
Him, FWH 39
LTA, final DDay 3.10
Happy. And amazed.
In recovery

Posts: 747 | Registered: Aug 2011
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 9:53 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am going to make " schmaltzy untrue crap" board on Pinterest.

You are baaaad!

I am deeply humbled by everyone's comments. Thank you BSs who face infidelity square in the eyes and keep pressing on. You all are incredible, strong, beautiful people.

[This message edited by Aubrie84 at 10:10 AM, March 30th (Friday)]


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6045 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
JKL Vikings
♂ Member
Member # 32094
Default  Posted: 10:07 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Well done Aubrie
(Insert Hufi's clapping hands guy, I'm not tech savvy enough to do it)


Her- Alpha Female 40
Me-FWH 41
Married since '02, together since 2000
D-day 2/10/2009
3 sons- J- born Oct 2001
K- born Sept. 2005
L- born Apr. 2008
We ALL have issues. It's how we deal with them that makes the difference

Posts: 515 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Dallas, TX
Tred
♂ Member
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 10:14 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Aubrie,

Great post. Love is "burnt dinners"...reminds me of my W's birthday a couple of years ago. I was making ribs on the grill, it started to rain. I didn't check them quite enough times, and whoosh...

Love is real life. Shared memories, both good and bad. All captured eloquently in your post. Should be a "Love is..." thread in reconciliation. Definitely sending this to my wife.


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 3740 | Registered: Dec 2011
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 10:58 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's funny that this post came up.

Me and my H were just having this conversation last night.

I asked him why he married me as I am so different from what he came from. I literally turned his world upside down. Why would he want that?

He came up with that he loved me at the time with what he knew of love, of course he had really no idea of what real love was, that would come later. With bills, and babies, and the various things that life throws at you. That shows you what real love is. If you you are going to stick with that person through all of that. That was when he knew he really loved me, he wanted to be with me through all of that too.


Me45 Him 45 Hardlessons DS 25,23,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Eleanor Roosevelt

Posts: 4483 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
DixieD
♀ Member
Member # 33457
Default  Posted: 11:08 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Should be a "Love is..." thread in reconciliation.

Two naked cartoon characters.

The Love Is characters are kinda how I picture Mr. and Mrs. Aubrie -- with clothes on of course

I'd forgotten about those cartoons. My sister used to cut them out of the paper every week.


Growing forward

Posts: 1737 | Registered: Sep 2011
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The Love Is characters are kinda how I picture Mr. and Mrs. Aubrie

Totally had to Google that because I had NO clue who they were...

I love them! They're adorable! And lookie, they even have clothes on!


*POOF!*

[This message edited by Aubrie84 at 2:10 PM, March 30th (Friday)]


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6045 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
DixieD
♀ Member
Member # 33457
Default  Posted: 11:40 AM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I knew you wouldn't -- you are too young!! Dammit

Yup -- you guys are adorable

Thanks for sharing.


Growing forward

Posts: 1737 | Registered: Sep 2011
MissesJai
♀ Member
Member # 24849
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My BH has seen me at my worst, but saw the best in me, and chose to love me anyway.
indeed...damn, now my allergies are starting to act up!!! *sniff*


FWW - 40
I'm big on personal responsibility. Own your shit. ALL OF IT.

Posts: 5764 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: So Cal.....
uncertainone
♀ Member
Member # 28108
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Me: 37

'til the roof comes off. 'til the lights go out. 'til my legs give out, can't shut my mouth


Posts: 6795 | Registered: Mar 2010
onlysolution
♀ Member
Member # 23160
Default  Posted: 2:01 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second.

I laughed when I read this quote and thought...okay, what about the 3rd and the 4th and 5th time?


FWW: Me 52
BH: 54
Married 34 years
Recovery - Over 4 years

Posts: 448 | Registered: Mar 2009
JNRPA
♀ New Member
Member # 35173
Default  Posted: 4:00 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think that's what I needed to hear 2 months ago. Great explanation!
Thanks!


ME: 38
BH: 41
Kids: 10,9,6
D-Day: 30Jan12
not giving up

Posts: 38 | Registered: Mar 2012
so-wrong
♀ Member
Member # 33653
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

well said Aubrie - well said!

I think I have single-handedly destroyed the words "I love you" to my BH. I am not sure he will ever say them to me again.... but i dont shy away from telling him why i love him and the things that remind me every single day why i love him.

You know what? I know this sounds kinda gross, but when our little one throws up in the middle of the night and Mr.So-wrong jumps up and cleans it all up while I attend to our son, immediately, without asking..... i feeeeel love.

and so many other things..... but dont want to T/J anymore! GOOD POST AUBRIE!


- I made some really bad choices and now I need to make it right. And along the way, I will make me better too.....

Posts: 171 | Registered: Oct 2011
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 5:20 PM, March 30th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No worries about t/j so-wrong. Love it up here. I don't mind at all.

Tred also started a thread in Recon called "Love Is..." so you can wax poetic over there as well.


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"What if I fall?" Oh but my darling, what if you fly?


Posts: 6045 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: South, Y'all!
Offhispedestal
♀ Member
Member # 32528
Default  Posted: 3:31 PM, March 31st (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I mention SI at least once a week or every other week. But your post? I copied and emailed it to him. He HATES reading and your entire post and told me " this is what we have and I'll prove to you everyday with my actions that this is where I want to be with you and our family, he says there is NO comparison " he loved your post and it blew him away


ME-44
WH-45
Married 24


2Beautiful daughters
DD 6/26/10 (he broke down & confessed)
DD#2 3/14/11 H in OW's car
TT 7/1/11 (NC broken, through emails)

In R


Posts: 629 | Registered: Jun 2011
Topic Posts: 61
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