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User Topic: Betrayed Men- Part 8
VD2012
♂ Member
Member # 36317
Default  Posted: 5:23 PM, August 8th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Speaking of the OM, I'd love to see him dead in all honesty. I actually thought about doing it myself too in the early weeks after D-Day. But, his life isn't worth mine. For my daughter and even my FWW I can't be all homicidal even if it's what I really really really really want to do sometimes.

Confronting him and knocking his teeth out has always been an option though since he's a coworker and I know when he works, but still I'd be trading my good name and dignity for a momentary joy. I'm better than that piece of shit. Plus I won't give him the satisfaction to think he matters.

I guess for me it's really a problem because I've seen his texts to my wife, and know how the A went down. I could see his manipulation and coercion first hand.

My story in short form for those who don't want to read my gargantuan first post: My wife and I both have massive FOO issues, especially her. We have had a terrible couple of years (her losing her job, parents dying and other major issues) and she went on a birth control pill that started really messing with her. She seemingly had a mental breakdown earlier this year (and legitimately can't remember a lot). During which an older married guy at work started taking an interest in her and gradually started probing her about her childhood. He eventually kept asking her to talk as friends outside of work over coffee, she agreed after he kept at it and then she lied to me about it (and I've told her regardless of what happened after, THIS was betraying me). They met at a coffee shop, drove around talking for a bit and he took her off to a secluded trail, she didn't know where she was, and he came onto her. She didn't know how to react so went with it out of fear, confusion and ashamedly admitted curiosity. His texts indicate disappointment with how she wasn't into it and she needs to be more enthusiastic... fucking prick.

The A continued for a few weeks during which she was beyond fucking erratic at home and strange, seemingly obsessed with rape websites, her phone and scrubbing herself raw in the bathtub. And there I was thinking it was just more manifestation of her out there behaviour she'd had for months. She tried ending it through text 3 separate times, but he didn't want to, and he convinced her he'd talk to her again (like really talk, about her life and shit which is what she wanted) if she'd promise to give him a blow job. Sadly she agreed and then did it, resulting in no actual talk. She felt degraded as fuck, seemingly threatened to call him while his wife was around and started thinking of ending it. Then I caught her.

The great irony of my situation I've dealt with is without the text messages I wouldn't believe a damned thing about her seemingly incredulous story. Yet with them and seeing what that sack of shit said, helps prove what she's told me as true.

She's always been easily manipulated, naive and gullible. She will bend over backwards to please anyone and may very well have borderline personality disorder due to her upbringing. She honestly will let people walk all over her, say thank you, and let them keep going in any desperate hope to make them like her and keep them happy. This sadly manifested in.

So here's this older piece of shit literally using my wife, with no remorse and is outright obviously manipulating her during the worst time of her life from a mental and emotional level. She believed herself alone without family (which sadly at the time was true) - and I'm going to admit I was a fucking prick in the weeks leading up to the A, even threatening divorce because I couldn't handle her detached emotionally dead zombie like state anymore - not exactly my finest hour. She honestly had barely any friends and the few she had at work were using her and are whorish parasites. And sadly the other man is fulfilling her lifelong daddy issues by feeding into her desire for a mentor and someone to look up to, then gets her nice and vulnerable...

And I can't do shit.

I so badly want this fucker to pay. But he gets to live out the rest of his life with the memories of what he did with my wife. My wife isn't innocent mind you, there really is no excuse for her behaviour, but she was so desperate for anyone in life to be nice to her. I truly do believe she didn't intend to do shit all but got caught up in the bullshit regardless.

I've even pleaded with her to tell me she went into it willingly, excited and happy to connect with someone... or something. Then I'd still only be dealing with her betraying me, not the rest of this shit that leaves me filled with rage. Don't fuck with what's mine, seriously. Yet he did, and my hands are tied.

Sometimes I wish I didn't know her so well and have their texts, and wish I wasn't such an understanding person ridiculously in love. Then I'd just have looked at her, said "you're a lying cheating bitch who threw everything away" and be done with it... yet that's not the way of it. Ugh. there I go rambling again.

So fucking frustrating...


Me: 28 ~ Her (FR2012): 27
Together: 9 years, 2 children
D-Day: April 19, 2012

Surrender to the truth of life.


Posts: 466 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Traversing Dark Places With The Light of Truth
jjct
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Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, August 8th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Don't even worry about rambling on here VD, they let me stay here despite my orange barreling (bad poetry) Woodstock posts. I might be an exception but no - I WASN'T THERE, and didn't take none o that! (despite what mpb says!)

You just put it all out there, we'll unravel the skeins. YOU WILL!

It's been over 6 mo. since DDay... Shouldn't this way of thinking be done by now?

I'm 5 years past Dday. Divorcing. I decided early on, thank God!
He has got the best revenge.
Not me.
So I let it go - kinda like the jews wishing "
his blood is on our hands", they dam themselves with their own words. ( my op wrote in a blog post how he believes in karma - I figure he's damned by his own words)

the reason I'm sounding like this today is not bc of acid, it's bc I lost a furry friend.
Today.
(bad) poetry consumes me at times, well, most times, since I now hear the world this way. pls forgive me.

I know this will disappear into ephemera, ex what the heart keeps noescape))) I'm glad brother, but it's just the way my mind flows. It hears this song. How can i not get someone to sing along?

Choosing not to kill him is the healthy alternative.


the movie. There's the movie we're writing.

celebrate tonight! Somehow I did not notice this happen, but her A is not the first thing I think of when I wake up. Now if it just did not think about it during the day life would be sweet.

This. Is time talking. Am so happy for you, you don't know.

I was a fucking prick in the weeks leading up to the A, even threatening divorce because I couldn't handle her detached emotionally dead zombie like state anymore - I so badly want this fucker to pay. But he gets to live out the rest of his life with the memories of what he did with my wife. VD2012

Nope and dammit nope.
You are not a prick for demanding and ENFORCING boundaries.

jmo, the fukker will pay
inaway?
you haven't imagined.
It will be perfect.


Posts: 5996 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
wincing_at_light
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Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 7:10 PM, August 8th (Wednesday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry about your furry friend, jj. I hope you can find some peace.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
foundoutlater
♂ Member
Member # 32900
Default  Posted: 1:37 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Jjct Ė thanks man. It was a shocking realization. Sorry about you loss. Not everyone gets attached to the furry critters and can appreciate your loss. My hope is you can lean on the good memories to ride out the tears.

BTW the poetry reminds me of the kings jester Ė brings a smile to my face Ė sometimes bad is not bad.

V-

You are not a prick for demanding and ENFORCING boundaries.

While ^^^ is true, I believe it is also absolutely not relevant to what your wife did. So many people live with fucked up spouses and never do it. Youíve said it pretty well Ė your wife had issues. Thatís the bottom line, not you. I wrote and rewrote a bunch more about how this crap happens in good Mís, fucking someone else is not a choice made to fix the M and so much more youíve probably already read. IMHO it takes time, but you need to see it, believe it then feel it. What she did is not about you.


Your beliefs donít make you a better person, your behavior does.

Posts: 1058 | Registered: Jul 2011
DWBH
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Member # 35512
Default  Posted: 8:31 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Speaking of the OM, I'd love to see him dead in all honesty. I actually thought about doing it myself too in the early weeks after D-Day. But, his life isn't worth mine. For my daughter and even my FWW I can't be all homicidal even if it's what I really really really really want to do sometimes.
Confronting him and knocking his teeth out has always been an option though since he's a coworker and I know when he works, but still I'd be trading my good name and dignity for a momentary joy. I'm better than that piece of shit. Plus I won't give him the satisfaction to think he matters.

I guess for me it's really a problem because I've seen his texts to my wife, and know how the A went down. I could see his manipulation and coercion first hand.

I can relate to all of this, all too well. MOM is an ex-VERY close friend, who I still work with... and sit about 100 feet from. It's FUCKING HELL to see his car in the parking lot every day, and to occasionally see him in the hallways, etc. once a week or so. I fantasize almost daily about beating the fucking shit out of him. My kids are the main reason I do not (losing my job, getting arrested), and I too do not want to give him the satisfaction in knowing he's still inside my head this much.

My wife and others have suggested maybe it's best to just catch him in the parking lot, and 'allow' myself one good punch. He likely would not press charges and I likely wouldn't lose my job... but I do not trust my self-control. I couldn't stop at just one strike. I had to tell my wife to drop that line of thinking, and stop suggesting it to me, as I certainly don't need any external validation feeding the fury.


Me: BH, 43
Her: FWW, 41 (ThornyRose)
M: 16 years, together 19
2 Daughters: 14 and 12
D Day: 9/25/2011; Lies & TT to 5/4/2012
~Double betrayal; caught them in the act~

Posts: 729 | Registered: May 2012 | From: WI
VD2012
♂ Member
Member # 36317
Default  Posted: 9:00 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

jj - Sorry to hear about your furry friend.


After posting what I did yesterday I spent all night thinking about it until my wife came home from work and I talked to her about it.

You guys are right.

In fact, I've been doing a lot of thinking about Pre-A life and I realize I'm a lot harder than I need to be on myself. I wasn't the bad guy villain I keep thinking I was.

You push boundaries that shouldn't be crossed, you mock our marriage with your behaviour and generally put me through months of mental/emotional abuse even before betraying me... yet I was the bad guy. No. No, that ain't right. (edit: just wanted to add, since D-Day she wholly has owned up to what she did, and in no way has accused me of being why her A occurred or even remotely blamed me for Pre-A issues, she says they're all on her - but seemingly during that time I was the worst person alive)

I'm too defensive and protective of her still.

I was so focused on the A itself, but have been neglecting to address everything pre-A. Life fucking sucked and it honestly wasn't because of me. She may have legitimately had a mental breakdown (or not, I still am not certain) or whatever, but that doesn't excuse things.

I'm honestly sitting here feeling like a consolation prize, that after years of being together with me sacrificing so much of myself for her and being devoted to her she was testing uncharted waters a bit, then got into a situation that went too far for her.

That's what I told her last night. I don't give a shit about "intentions" or "I didn't mean" to, that doesn't change the fact you laid before another man and let him fuck you (and then proceeded to do whatever he wanted to make him happy - HIM HAPPY, what the fuck about me?). You were scared? Call the fucking police. Or better yet, don't fucking make a goddamned date with a man 20 years your senior, and I did, I told her it was a fucking date. "I just wanted a friend, someone to talk to" doesn't mean you can fucking lie to me about who you're going out with and go get coffee and walk on a trail. THAT was the second betrayal. The first was talking to him by text in secret. The boundaries were initially broken by talking with someone about your personal life, our daughter, your life while at work.

Oh, but sex wasn't what was planned. And ya know what, I truly do believe that. I know her well enough and understand the way she works, I don't think she went out to fuck around on me. I do think this piece of shit honestly did take advantage of my wife.

But she put herself there. She placed herself in that situation by betraying my trust in the first place. The knife was already in my back by agreeing to go out with him in secret, relenting to him for sex just twisted it in further.

And that's the thing, I even told her this, I think he blew it. If he hadn't pushed her for sex so quickly I know they would have kept having secret meetings and dates. There was no emotional affair, because he didn't nurture and string her feelings along enough, but that would have created it. And with enough time maybe she'd have wanted the sex.

Two things stopped it from progressing. He was too obvious in manipulating and using her (even she saw it) and I caught her. Nothing else. It could and would have been so much worse had he done things different. Maybe sprung for a hotel room instead of the dingy back of his van, maybe bought her a meal instead of a cup of coffee, maybe told her it was good sex and meant a lot to him instead of criticizing her and calling his kid right after (and how fucked up is that?). She was so fucking ripe for a full blown emotional/physical affair and he blew it... that's it.

But then I think, she's doing everything right since D-Day, perfectly in all honestly. Even last night, she took everything I had to say about shit, cried a bit (which she doesn't do often) and accepted things. Maybe this brush with infidelity set her straight and made her have those life altering epiphanies.

It's almost frustrating in how I haven't had that cathartic "you're a stupid fucking bitch" yell-fests I hear are so therapeutic. How do I get angry at someone who seems to different from months ago, someone who genuinely seems to love me and is trying her damndest to do right? She's been so remorseful and loving, that it really seems that this event completely altered her viewpoint on life and us and she truly is committed to me now and all that...

So why am I starting not to care?

Actually... I think I'm hitting this anger phase I've heard about.

I had sex with her the other night and I totally wasn't into it at all. We've been having fantastic sex since D-Day but the past few weeks I've slowly been losing my desire to even be near her (bye bye hysterical bonding?). I haven't told her because it'll cause problems. The other night I literally felt like I used her to get off, and that bothers me. I've never been so disconnected from her like that. And I keep envisioning "is this how you laid?", "is this what you did?" and so on, I can't get the visuals of this ugly fucker doing as he pleased with her.

And even though I've been exclusive to her through out our entire relationship, going out of my way to respect our exclusivity, I've shunned all other women. Here I am though, really really wondering what else is out there. She got to experience another dick, got to kiss someone else, have them touch her; what the fuck about me? I don't really give a shit if the experience was traumatic to her, this whole thing has obliterated my world view. And I am really wondering what having sex with another woman would be like. I've told her, and meant it, that when it comes down to it I never would and don't want to. But that curiosity that was never there before is nagging at the back of my head.

Yet, I still want her to comfort me and do all this loving remorseful stuff she's been doing. If she didn't I'd be gone. I fucking deserve that much. She's been so great in almost every way, she's like the perfect wife now.

But she's ruined everything... and I can't go back. I love her so much and she truly is an amazing woman. And she's doing everything right. But this 5-6 month period of her life has fucking ruined her for me. She was such a terrible bitch in all ways during that time, was never like that before and is light years beyond better now, yet I can't look past it.

How do I reconcile this in my brain? Ugh, enough rambling for now. My head hurts so much.

[This message edited by VD2012 at 9:05 AM, August 9th (Thursday)]


Me: 28 ~ Her (FR2012): 27
Together: 9 years, 2 children
D-Day: April 19, 2012

Surrender to the truth of life.


Posts: 466 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Traversing Dark Places With The Light of Truth
wincing_at_light
♂ Member
Member # 14393
Default  Posted: 9:30 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't have a ton of time to comment right now, VD, but I want to express to you that what you're feeling right now is like dead-on normal.

The hot sex in the beginning is usually called "hysterical bonding" -- you might have seen references to that elsewhere.

The withdrawal and anger are normal. You're probably having your first bit of rage stage, and when you *really* stop giving a shit, we call that The Plain of Lethal Flatness.

So you're normal, and you're on schedule.

Not sure if that helps you or not, but it was endlessly comforting to me back in the early days just to have someone tell me that what I was feeling wasn't crazy/fucked up/outrageous.

The anger and detachment are actually good indicators about your (personal) recovery because they tell me that you're feeling safe enough to start to process an emotion that isn't panic/bargaining/loss. It means you're getting your feet back under you and starting to parse the story you've been given critically -- you're trying to make sense of what it means.

I hope your wife has her big girl pants on, because she's about to realize what the rollercoaster *really* looks like.


Machiavellian idiot savant

Posts: 6687 | Registered: Apr 2007 | From: Indiana
MediumRare
♂ Member
Member # 35128
Default  Posted: 9:45 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ya know, what I find interesting... I really can't find myself hating the OM1/2 any more than I would if the affairs never happened.

I already loathe the kind of guys my WS ran to. They are your typical, entitled, narcissistic douche-bag types that objectify women, sleeping with 5-6 damaged women at any given time, STD factories, usually fathered lots of bastard children, and think they are God's gift to women. So from that angle, they are scum-bucket, bottom feeders... but I have no more or less contempt for them than any of their type, no different from those that haven't slept with my WS.

I simply despise my WS for doing what she did. For years, she has always complained about their type and I've always countered that I always blamed the women involved as these guys have no need to change since they always have PLENTY of women coming out of the woodwork willing to give them 5-6 back-to-back orgasms, suck their dicks morning, noon and night, etc. etc... (all before being kicked to the curb or slapped to make them a sammich). I told her the moment SO many damaged women stop fucking them and giving them their God complexes a dozen times a day, they might actually lose the attitude. But until then, their "all women are my playtoys" narcissism remains but only due to daily reminder & reinforcement that dumb, damaged women give them regularly.

Sad thing is, my WS now firmly established herself as one of those douche-bag enabling 'skank-asses' that gives to them with no other need than to be their personal cum dumpster with nothing in return.

So yah, I can't hate the OM in my scenario since I've always known they existed, always shook my head at DUMB women that lick their feet, but also know how deep down, their narcissism and attitude shrouds how deeply lonely and broken those guys truly are. When you also see where they eventually wind up in life, it's also pretty tragic.

I knew a few of their types in my 20's. They used to boast to me how women were wrapped around their finger, how they could waltz into just about anywhere and pick-up any woman they wanted (even if they were married/attached, etc.etc.), were always fucking a half dozen to a dozen women at any given time, etc. etc. Some of them are in their 50's now and every single one of them is in a place I'd never want to find myself... alone and destitute.


BS (ME): 44
WS(HER): 42
9 years
OM#1- 20-something loser, stole bunch of my things after she had sex with him in our bed (no condoms, STDs)
OM#2- 24 year old, unemployed loser, lives with mom & dad
DDay 1/2012
NC 3/20/2012
SGASDay 4/1/2012

Posts: 700 | Registered: Mar 2012 | From: California
DontTreadOnMe
♂ Member
Member # 35240
Default  Posted: 10:53 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

VD, your wife sounds a lot like mine. Had daddy issues..needed external validation from men... my words were only obligations as I 'had to' because I'm her husband. FUCK THAT.

She told that fucker multiple times she was married. The first time she went over to his place she stopped before it got below the belt, explaining that she was married and couldn't do it. Yet OM still pulled the strings (right out of PUA...fuckin douchebag)

He KNEW she was married. From the beginning. His roommate even called him out on having a married woman over the house.

I've gotten some revenge. Cannot share on here. But it isn't enough... I need to feel my fist break his jaw in two piece. I need to break his nose and make it permanently crooked. I want to apply the most effective pain compliance tools on him so he will hurt like no other (with no bruises or scarring! )

I know he's not worth it. But if we could have a legitimate rodeo, with no law involved... oh God I'm drooling just thinking about it. I'd break his neck but then that would be murder 1 of course. Hmm... I DO have a rifle with a scope... lol jk!


Me: WH/BH, 27 (addict in recovery)
Her: Lost333, BW/FWW, My DDay: 2/19/12, Hers: 9/29/12

Working on myself through IC, NA meetings, intensive outpatient program, and lots of digging. Praying for R.


Posts: 230 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Midwest
Mypoorboys
♂ Member
Member # 33169
Default  Posted: 11:00 AM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey jjct,
So sorry for your loss and I apologize, my reference to your poem was inappropriate and inconsiderate. At first I just insinuated some humor may lighten up the mood, but then I realized that everything said her is serious and genuine. Please accept my apology my friend.
As for the topic regarding killing, maiming or otherwise inflicting bodily harm to the OM, (scum-bag, low life boys behaving indifferently), they knowingly conducted themselves amorally, just happens that our, (in my case), ex slut WWs took the bait or even worse, may have thrown the line in the water!
Who cares, it's all shit and whether they, 'get their's', doesn't make a dick's worth of difference.
What are we to do? Follow their miserable lives and leap out from the shadows?
Nah, I still think that will be accomplished by someone else and we can remain standing tall, with respect and integrity.
Ah, fuck that, Medic, I need some of your medicine!
Love you all, well, (mediforicly, of course)
MPBs

Posts: 176 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: New Brunswick, New Jersey
hardlessons
♂ Member
Member # 35025
Default  Posted: 1:10 PM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've gotten some revenge.

DTOM,on the OM or WW? Or both?

I am 2+ years out and still would like a chance at the peice of shit and focusing on that turned me into a Wayward as you have recently admitted to by focusing on everything but myself. That was why I kept asking you "What are you doing to help yourself". I had issues(CA, FOO, blah blah) before the A and the A just made it all worse, like lowering the level in a river exposes the rocks. All the sharp pointy jagged rocks that you used to be able to float over now tear you up..

That feeling will always be there to some degree and the longer you focus on that the longer it will take you to recover, just sayin imo.


Me WH
Wife Tired Girl
3 adult sons
"a wayward...annnnd just a tad betrayed."

Posts: 838 | Registered: Mar 2012 | From: Arizona
DontTreadOnMe
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Member # 35240
Default  Posted: 1:27 PM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

DTOM,on the OM or WW? Or both?

I am 2+ years out and still would like a chance at the peice of shit and focusing on that turned me into a Wayward as you have recently admitted to by focusing on everything but myself. That was why I kept asking you "What are you doing to help yourself". I had issues(CA, FOO, blah blah) before the A and the A just made it all worse, like lowering the level in a river exposes the rocks. All the sharp pointy jagged rocks that you used to be able to float over now tear you up..

That feeling will always be there to some degree and the longer you focus on that the longer it will take you to recover, just sayin imo.

Advertently to dbOM (douchebagOM); inadvertently to Lost. I have given her a lot of shit that is inexcusable. But thank God she is in it for the long haul because she is a great wife, and I know that I can be a great husband. (Slowly getting there)

I had boundary issues before, as well as CSA, cheating parents, pothead parents, you name it. Dependency is built into me. When it wasn't Lost I could depend on, I turned elsewhere. (drinking, meds, dating sites)

I really feel like in order for me to heal, I need more time away from Lost. Not necessarily separating; but just having more space at home. For example: we just moved this weekend. Yesterday I was in the garage, putting these giant 1200 pound cap. shelves together. (made in usa of course). To me, that shit is therapy. Whether it's fixing stuff, workin on Juliet, (my car), doing some woodwork, etc. Yet she came out to the garage numerous times and almost always seemed to dampen the mood. She'd call me in so I could "see bla bla bla". Yes, I care about what she is doing. But how can I accomplish anything when I'm constantly being needed by Lost. I know she needs validation; as do I. And I know this sucks. But sometimes I don't know what else to say to her.

If I tell her I'd like to be alone, she assumes I'm upset with her. She then pouts and/or gets defensive, which usually is followed by an argument.

It's just so frustrating.

As far as "revenge" on OM...I can only say one thing on here. He is single (35), fucking loser (as usual). I was looking for a bw or gf to send a letter to, but could not find one. So I sent one to his parents instead, telling them what a shitbag they raised!


Me: WH/BH, 27 (addict in recovery)
Her: Lost333, BW/FWW, My DDay: 2/19/12, Hers: 9/29/12

Working on myself through IC, NA meetings, intensive outpatient program, and lots of digging. Praying for R.


Posts: 230 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Midwest
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 6:29 PM, August 9th (Thursday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

mpb, man, no need at all to apologize! It's all good brother, no worries!

Thanks for the well-wishes friends. I got her as a companion for my boys when my first ww abandoned us and moved in with her op, so there was a tie-back to old times. She went peacefully, under the shade...bonus: the pretty vet hugged me twice!
I still have the other one, (got later as a companion for her), best dog I ever had. We're what's left of the team,
except!
24yo Son#2 called and said he was done with the area he lives in, wants to come move in with me for a coupla...till he gets his feet under him.

I'm loving that because he's such a great kid, but - I may have found him a job in a different location, we'll see...has the potential to make lots of dough...

Shieldmates we are.


Posts: 5996 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Mypoorboys
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Member # 33169
Default  Posted: 9:20 AM, August 10th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey jjct!
My ex is a veterinarian and pretty, did you hug her
Only kidding my friend. That's for clearing up my issue and that's great news that you and your son have a good relationship.
My boys want a dog as soon as I move into my house, but then there is all the responsibility that comes along with it. Plus, I would have to get a pet sitter to let it out during the day, so maybe the boys will have to wait until Dad retires in 3 yrs.
So, back to the revenge topic.
Yes, I, for one, do at times, although seldom now, (and that is a good thing), fantasize about all kinds of scenarios to out the scumbag, but they are only fantasies. Don't know what I will do when I finally find myself in close quarters with the asshole. Guess it will depend upon the situation and whether he is in uniform, ie. carrying.
Maybe I should start hanging with Medic or, we can start our own club called, 'the avengers'?
Anyone out there ever get the opportunity to set things straight with the Wsluts fuckmates?
MPBs

Posts: 176 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: New Brunswick, New Jersey
wonderingbull
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Member # 14833
Default  Posted: 1:35 PM, August 10th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've been able to send the Karma Bus around the block a few times to hit the OM....

The fucker is a fireman that mowed our yard... He's a major NPD and hunts down married women so it will pump up his shitty ego...

When I finally squeezed the OM's name out of the ex I contacted him via email and told him that he'd better get tested for herpes because he'd been screwing the ex (who has herpes) bareback for the better part of a year and if he didn't have it before her then he certainly has it now... Betcha that made his butt hole pucker up!!!

I let him know in no uncertain terms that I was well connected in this city and that I will be relentless in making sure that I will pull any and all strings to fuck him with his own dick right up the ass every chance I get...

Well, well. At the airport, heading out of town for a business meeting recently I saw the OM put his name in the hat for fire chief... Picture and all...

Landed in the meeting city and called the mayor who I've known since we were kids... Told him who and what the OM is... He laughed and said it's time to cut this off at the knees....

Lo and behold OM withdrew his name two days later... I sent the worm an email just saying... "You really thought you had a future in this city? You underestimated me? I am and always will be relentless. Ruining your life is a simple pleasure for me"

I also got him kicked out of being the local union presidency...

That dick can choke on my dust!

I really don't want to kick the guy's ass... I just always want him to be looking over his shoulder wondering where I might be to fuck with him some more...

Everything I've read about NPD assholes is that the older they get the more paranoid they become because they worry about people knowing what they are behind their masks... He knows I know and it's going to haunt him till his last breath...

Revenge is a dish best served cold my friends...

WB


The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time...

James Taylor


Posts: 5893 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: A better place
foundoutlater
♂ Member
Member # 32900
Default  Posted: 1:52 PM, August 10th (Friday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WB Ė that kind of revenge is as good as it gets IMHO.

I really don't want to kick the guy's ass... I just always want him to be looking over his shoulder wondering where I might be to fuck with him some more

Most of the time now I just donít care about him. But I vacillate between four possibilities Ė a slow and torturous death, immediate death, extremely painful beat down and then just keeping him down (as you have). Those first three can never lead to anything good and quite honestly it is just the rage and hormones talking. It is not my go-to reaction normally and I am not willing to trade in one once of myself worth for a little revenge (Iím not a fan of an eye for an eye Ė just creates lotís of blind people). The last one however is just sweet and poetic. He chases married woman to stroke his ego, well I canít imagine a better way to beat his ego down without compromising your own integrity than to make sure he does not get anything he does not deserve.


Your beliefs donít make you a better person, your behavior does.

Posts: 1058 | Registered: Jul 2011
jjct
♂ Member
Member # 17484
Default  Posted: 4:19 AM, August 11th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

...always looking over his shoulder...pissing his pants in paranoia...sounds like a scene from a movie...o yeah.

Piss is warm. Revenge is cold. (like silence is golden and duck tape's silver - works for me)

mbp))) sorry @ the inadvertent trigger!


Posts: 5996 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: texas
Medic17
♂ Member
Member # 12832
Default  Posted: 10:57 AM, August 11th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have the permanent worldly removal of the OM all planned out, including which abandoned well his body is going in.....only if i completely lose my sanity. Not to that point by any means. I did inform him that if he saw me out in public , that i better not see him. That being said I saw him at the mall yesterday, he stopped, i reached to the small of my back like i was reaching for "something" (which i did not have) tshirt dont conceal much. hehehe he ran like a rabbit.

Small victories!


Piece of mind is slowly becoming a 4" grouping at 600 yards

Posts: 381 | Registered: Dec 2006 | From: NC
Merlin
♂ Member
Member # 30221
Default  Posted: 11:35 AM, August 11th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It sucks to know that your WW chose to do what she did with who she did. But that's the truth of it - she chose.

The only words I ever spoke to OM were to caution him about the wellbeing of my children. He knows that if they ever need so much as a band-aid and he's in the room, that he will disappear like a puff of smoke.

OM's are not worth a moment of your time or a single brain cell. If they knew your WW was married when they made their play, they aren't even men.

Spend your time, your thoughts, your life being a better man, not ruminating over vengeance on someone beneath you.

[This message edited by Merlin at 11:37 AM, August 11th (Saturday)]


"I never saw a wild thing sorry for itself. A bird will fall frozen dead from a bough without ever having felt sorry for itself." D. H. Lawrence

Her: WW/56 Me: BS/62, 24yrs M
3 great kids, now 22, 20, 17 b,b,g
D-Day 8/14/08, D 1/13/11


Posts: 1052 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: East Coast
kchip
♂ Member
Member # 36365
Default  Posted: 5:52 PM, August 11th (Saturday), 2012View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Any ideas for revenge - pls read:

So I am looking over the cell bills on ATT.com- March is just ridiculous. 10,000 text messages . So i set out on looking at all 150 pages of the PDF. I notice a few things, then a pattern. I know some of these numbers but there is so many texts to/from a couple of phones with 561 area codes. Hundreds. Now I know the OM's phone number (at least I thought) he won't take my calls but answers my texts. He has another number, but wont answer but returns texts from that line too. So I ask the WW who the hell is in 561 that texts you so much. "its him" she says. I said there is 3 different numbers - she says "i know". Now - my math is fuzzy I say to WW, but that is 5 different cell phones...one person?
There are thousands of texts from all 5 lines in the last 8 months.

I ask WW - don't you find that odd that this deutchbag has 5 cell phone lines? Then, i recall that he has as at least 3 gmail accounts to from my discovery on DD1.

I asked WW - has there been contact? She says "no", but I sense it, another lie.

I ask her - your ready to throw away everything, our home, our family, our business, all for a serial cheater? (OM is married with 2 kids) She says, yes....I want a divorce.

I said then your a fool - its over.

Then she breaks. I know I have finally gotten on to the right trail of whats been happening.

I know she's no angel, but this guy - the OM - omg - he's a monster. Narcissistic, obviously manipulative, controlling, and clearly skilled.

The phone bill and texts timeline are very revealing right up to D-DAy 1 and all the texts before, during, and all afternoon and night. I remember that day to well....sigh.
Any ideas on how to get back at this fucking prick? I am going to see his wife on 8/16. Any other good revenge ideas?

As for WW, i dont know.....

We will see.


Me: BH (42)
2 boys, age 10/7
D Day: July 15, 2012
Status: DIVORCING
You know that movie, Sleeping With the Enemy? Well I am Julia Roberts in that one......sighhhh
"When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change"

Posts: 471 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: FL
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