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User Topic: Betrayed Spouse S.T. D. Support
SI Staff
Moderator
Member # 10
Default  Posted: 7:39 AM, December 8th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This thread is for BS's that are dealing with sexually transmitted diseases. This thread is for advice and support only, and we recommend all BS's consult with a medical professional.

Posts: 10000 | Registered: May 2002
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 9:13 AM, December 8th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, Wow!! Thanks, mods, for this thread!!

Unfortunately, I belong here. Before the A, I was my WSs 'only'. He contracted HPV and Herpes from his A. I was in the dark for a long time and I made HUGE mistakes right after d-day- like having unprotected sex with him. Sooooooo... I found some bumps two years ago and went flying to the Dr. to get checked for HPV. I was STUNNED when they called and said the HPV was negative, but the Herpes was positive. I started to remember when I started having what I called 'wicked yeast infections' and it was just after the A began. I went on Valtrex and have lived a pretty normal life since then- until recently...

I was scheduled to have an oral surgery and I wanted to go off of the Valtrex because I didn't want to admit that I had this- and I have HSV2, so they weren't in danger of getting it from me. So, I ditched the meds and thought I'd just go on them 'as needed'. I can't tell you how much I am regretting that now.

I started feeling tired- like I had mono or something. I have MS and Psoriatic Arthritis, so fatigue is common with those, so I didn't think much about it. I started getting itchy, so I switched-up laundry detergent and my shower gel. I still had problems, so I got a one-day Monistat (and here's where I should have realized what was happening), the applicator hurt. Then, the tell-tale signs appeared and I re-started the Valtrex, but I guess it was too late. That was early October and I am still suffering. Part of it is because my insurance company is jacking me around and required me to go on a less effective med, so I had overlapping outbreaks. The pain has been unreal. The Dr.s are having a hard time getting it settled down because of my other immune issues and I have now been referred to an Infectious Disease Specialist. I hope they can help me.

So, I've felt very alone in this. We are reconciled and I sometimes think it would be a lot easier if he were my 'asshole ex'- at least, I could express my feelings about having gotten this. He did this to me. And it's so hard for him to watch me going through this. It just sucks all around.


Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 11:22 PM, December 8th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree, thanks mods!!

I got tested for STD's about 5-6 months after D-day because he TT'd me to death. Anyway, I got tested for everything but only was positive for BV. About 5 months later I wanted to be tested again just to make sure and the Dr told me I had HPV warts

We were onlies, so I know they are from one of his OW (there were 2).

I just hate being reminded about the A every night while using the medication. We are in R and it just brings it all back.

Thought, I'm sorry about your condition. I hope it clears up soon. I started having "wicked yeast infections" after the start if his A too but tested negative for Herpes. I still feel like something's weird.

Good luck


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 4:46 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

0115,

Thanks for your thoughts. I hope this clears-up soon. I have had about as much as I can take!!

I just wanted to make sure you knew that Herpes isn't included in the standard STD screen. I went in and specifically asked for everything, so I thought it had been done. If you didn't specifically ask for it, they probably didn't do it. I found out a couple years after my initial STD tests came back 'all clear'.

About the HPV, my H had an extreme case requiring surgery- it's really, really rare for that to happen. You are using a med? If it's Aldera, that one is really promising in HPV and certain skin cancers, as it helps your body to learn to fight the virus.

If you still feel like something's 'off' down there, go back and have them check again. Hang in there! We'll get through this!!


Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
blonde1963
♀ New Member
Member # 20806
Default  Posted: 5:59 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Can someone please tell me how you get genital warts, FWH says they are from stress is this true??


I dont like being second choice

Posts: 20 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: australia
blonde1963
♀ New Member
Member # 20806
Default  Posted: 6:08 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh I should have mentioned he gave me Clamidea(i hope the spelling is correct)he kept saying, im not stupid I used a condom. He didnt use one on his tongue tho did he(Fuckwit)


I dont like being second choice

Posts: 20 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: australia
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 7:04 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow. Genital warts are NOT from stress!! (((blonde1963))) Genital warts are cause by the Human Pappilloma Virus (HPV), which is a sexually transmitted virus. Use of condoms may not always protect you, in the case of both Herpes and HPV.

Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
blonde1963
♀ New Member
Member # 20806
Default  Posted: 8:17 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I thought that you could have it for years without symptoms and stress can bring it on.


I dont like being second choice

Posts: 20 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: australia
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 8:51 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am struggling with the timing on HPV warts too.

Blonde, from what I've heard it's common that they show up in the following months of first exposure. If they don't, your body probably has fought the virus and they won't show up. BUT I have also heard that stress and pregnancy can bring them on AGAIN, assuming you got them the first time.

My Dr. prescribed Zyclara (imiquoimod) I worry about so many things...probably stupid things but I will say that I was very naive when it came to ANY type of STD's because I "knew" we were onlies. YUCK!

So he never got warts...just passed them on to me

I will say that I would have NEVER even known that I had them if the Dr. hadn't told me. I know that sounds weird too but they are very tiny lines and deep inside...it's not like I check there
I guess there are many forms of them because they don't look like the pics on the internet at all.

Thought, I did get tested for Herpes (only because the people on SI told me to specifically ask for it). i have Herpes simplex 1 but not 2. I really hope you get some relief! You sound so strong and I feel like such a baby!

I go crazy when I think back when he started the A. My body was acting up and I thought I was crazy!! They are so cruel that they didn't tell.


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 10:20 AM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I thought that you could have it for years without symptoms and stress can bring it on.
That can happen, but the cause is the virus.

You sound so strong and I feel like such a baby!
Oh, no! I've been bawling my eyes out for two months!! I try to understand that this won't kill me, but it is awful! And I get 'icked out' when I think about this coming from her. So, no, I don't feel strong. I've tried to be hopeful, but this is really wearing me down.

Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
forgivingnow
♀ Member
Member # 33549
Default  Posted: 3:48 PM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I found out last week my husband has the virus molluscum. Anyone been thru this?


Me-BS 51
FWH-51
M 31 yrs.
Dday 3-19-11, TT 10/2011, Full truth July 2013
Strength comes from within. You can't get it from someone or go somewhere to get it. It is already here, waiting to be used when you need it most. Believe in yourself.
R

Posts: 615 | Registered: Oct 2011
0115
♀ Member
Member # 31740
Default  Posted: 6:17 PM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Forgivingnow

Unfortunately, 4 out of my 5 children have had it. Nothing to do with sexual transmission for them (it tends to spread in pools) but it can be spread sexually in adults.

It's not horrible, just a pain to deal with. My oldest sons had theirs frozen off (liquid nitrogen)at a dermatologist, my daughter and youngest son used ZymaDerm and I think it works the best if used faithfully. It used to be only available online but now you can get it at Walgreens too. I've tried the silver stuff and it didn't work at all. They can go away on their own but it can take up to two years. They will still pop up every now and then but they are building an immunity to them.

I'm not really sure about the genital kind but I think it's more or less the same thing...a virus (like warts, but soft and bubbly) that eventually go away. They say they're contagious but my middle daughter never got them and neither did my H or I. I guess it just depends on your immunity to the virus.

Sorry you're dealing with it. Just checked your profile...good luck on R, we're about the same age and have been married the same amount of time.


BS (me) 49
FWH 49 newbeg2011
Married 29 years
Very Long LTA
DD 01/15/11-6/30/11
The hard work is done...let the healing begin.

Posts: 1011 | Registered: Apr 2011
blonde1963
♀ New Member
Member # 20806
Default  Posted: 6:41 PM, December 9th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Now I really really need to clarify something if there are any GP's on here. Can you go 15 years with the virus then the warts show up??? He went with a couple of prostitutes before we met (around 17 18)and got the warts at 35 before the the first known OW


I dont like being second choice

Posts: 20 | Registered: Aug 2008 | From: australia
Elisabeth Ann
♀ Member
Member # 28599
Default  Posted: 12:55 AM, December 11th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am HIV positive. My husband and I have been married since 1/70 and I found out 2 months after our 40th Anniversary that he had contracted HIV from a stripper that he had unprotected sex with in 2008. Previously in that year, he had cruised chat rooms and slept with several women he met online. Luckily for them, the person who gave him the disease was the last stranger he had sex with, so I was the only person he infected. Ironically, he doesn't have to take any medications but because he didn't tell me for 9 months after he was diagnosed, I am on a daily regimen of 3 pills a day for the rest of my life. If you read my profile or my journal, I hope you will all make sure to get an HIV test. They are not done routinely and since there are no symptoms until you are very ill (which can take years) you can be HIV positive without knowing it. To all of you I send prayers that none of you ever have to add this disease to the heartbreak you already suffer.

Posts: 134 | Registered: May 2010 | From: Long Island, NY
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 1:40 AM, December 11th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Elisabeth Ann)))

I'm familiar with your story. Any of us here could be HIV+, many probably are and just don't know it- yet. You know you can talk to us here, whenever you're feeling alone. We're here for you.


Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
LionessQn76
♀ Member
Member # 32366
Concerned  Posted: 10:23 AM, December 11th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Hugs)))

My exbf from hs had sex with me knowing he had an active outbreak.

XWSO knew I had herpes and for 8yrs we were together he didn't contract it. I never had sex while I had an flareup and we practice goodh hygeine after sex.

I have few flare up now seems to be stress related.

http://www.cdc.gov/std/hpv/stdfact-hpv.htm


Only the strong survives!

Posts: 424 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: New York City
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 3:55 PM, December 11th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow! I am so glad we have finally been given our own thread.

Yep, my H infected me with his whore's STD. That was how I found out he was cheating...my doctor told me, nice huh? :(


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7099 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
ThoughtIKnewYa
♀ Member
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 8:25 AM, December 15th (Thursday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((Lioness))))
(((painpaim)))

Well, I see an Infectious Disease Specialist on Tues. and I'm ready. Hoping she can help me. I *think* I'm doing better- swelling is going down... Still itchy though. Still icing down the hoo-ha.


Posts: 11743 | Registered: Mar 2008
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 1:12 PM, December 16th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping for stillilovehim.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7099 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
painpaingoaway
♀ Member
Member # 27196
Default  Posted: 5:11 PM, December 16th (Friday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Anyone getting the Gardasil shot for their kids?
I just took DS22 for his second shot, even though he has already been sexually active for years. His doc said it can't hurt.


me BS female 56/him WS 59
Married 33 years
D-day July 09/he gave me his slut's STD
Watch my movie: "My wayward husband's adventures in STD land":
Episode 1: youtu.be/9Jv0-d_CdYc
Episode 2: http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8Tz822H82Gk

Posts: 7099 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Coastal South
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