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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long Term Affair Part 23
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 6:14 PM, February 13th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Laura28... Most people just don't know what to do as far as telling or not telling.

What I did was to ask my W, just tell me everyone you betrayed me with.. It won't make it any worse for me to know at this point. I told her to free her mind and soul now and let everything out. I told her to do it for herself.. have a clean mind for yourself.. not me...

It worked. That is when she told me about her A back in 1987. Yes, that one hurt. They all hurt.

Anyway... I got flowers from her today. She became romantic to me last Thursday... In fact, she put a blanket on me last week too. She even told me she in her sleep that appreciates me.

DeepP.. Are you doing better? You sounded so down a couple weeks ago.

My best friend is struggling too. His GF is addicted to Vicodin. She is not in a good place in life. My friend has been struggling to break up. It's not easy. He finally changed his facebook status... lol. Today that has huge meaning.

So, all the sudden a lady he met 3 years ago ask him to review her Biz plan. Friday meeting to talk about that ended up in a Saturday night movie date. He was so excited!

That could be you DeepP.. That will be you having some fun. You keep going to the gym. You look like your in good shape and women like men in the healthy weight range. Hope progress with you new job too.

Why is it so hard for us all to move forward?

I actually went to mass today for the first time since Christmas. My prayers were with you all...

Peace.

[This message edited by trynhard at 6:27 PM, February 13th (Sunday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
ImNellNow
♀ Member
Member # 28753
Default  Posted: 6:50 PM, February 13th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Welcome, Sister. This is the first chance I've had to check in... sadly, not because of having fun. My BFF got sick and couldn't fly in so I spent the weekend doing Boyo-centered stuff. Good, but not in the way I had hoped. Now awaiting WH's return from the $15 haircut place.

Tribe, I'm sad today. I feel very separated from people who love me (except from my Boyos, who love me and I thank God for them every day). I was really looking forward to this visit from my BFF, and I'm very disappointed to have no one to cry on. WH is not there for me. Big surprise, right? Tomorrow will be better.

Peace out.


BS & D
Drinking wine and thinking bliss is on the other side of this.

Posts: 2370 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Baby steps on my new path
LookingforLove
♀ Member
Member # 12002
Default  Posted: 7:33 PM, February 13th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey All--
Love the new digs...

Hugs to all that are struggling.
I am struggling as well since Valentines Day is tomorrow and I am sure WH has something for OW--this will probably be the first Vday that I will not get anything.
This is now my new reality...
I have decided to not go home again after work tomorrow--just leaving him a note to heat up food for kids.
Just can't look at him on VDay

My BFF suggested last week that I buy myself some flowers and leave them on my nightstand with the card removed---game playing? Yes, I guess it is but I was a part of the game he was playing for years and didn't realize it--
I guess it will look like someone gave me flowers...he would never think that I gave them to myself...
has anyone ever done this? I have never done this, so I am a little hesitant....


Me: BS
Him: WS LTA 6+ yrs
OW: Skank Company HO
Status:
Divorce filed 4-5-11
WH served on 4-6-11 with D papers and NC order.
Divorced: 4/20/12

Posts: 1114 | Registered: Sep 2006 | From: Washington State
njgal480
♀ Member
Member # 24938
Default  Posted: 8:49 PM, February 13th (Sunday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nell-
sorry that you feel so down. I think that after d-day we are all very sensitive and easily hurt and disappointed.
Fragile-would be the word that describes the BS.

Looking-
Send the flowers to yourself to make yourself feel better. To remind yourself that you deserve good things in your life.

Tryin- I did the same thing with my husband.
I sat him down at one point and told him to tell me everything. Not to hold back any information. That it was better to get it all out once and for all rather than my finding out later and going through all of the heartache all over again.
He swore that there were never any other affairs before this one.
But, he did give me a detailed timeline of all their trysts...for all 5 yrs.
And, he told me about every contact -even of a non sexual nature.
For example- she drove over 3 hours to meet up with him and other co-workers that were at a conference. She was not supposed to be at this conference...so, she took a sick day and drove over 3 hrs to 'party' with these drinking buddies in their hotel room.
She got drunk, passed out in my husband's room...no sex that night...just this very bizarre behavior for a 52 yr old woman...she had to sneak out the next day to make sure the bosses didn't see her because she had no reason to be there.
My H also told me that she had pushed her way into our house. We had moved into a new place. Another co-worker was going to stop by at lunch time to see it and guess who tagged along? My H said that he felt very uncomfortable about her presence in our home (he always tried to keep her and the LTA very compartmentalized)but he did not want to make a scene in front of the other co-worker.
So the skank nosed around my new house!

That story is an example of the kind of detail he went into. It was and continues to be very painful...some of these non sexual invasions into my family life bother me more than the sex!
But..the fact that he was willing to share them made me believe him even more...

That's the message you have to give the WS. Trickle truth kills any chance of reconciling. Full disclosure is the way to begin true healing.
The truth will set both of you free.


Me- BS
Him- WH
Long term marriage
D-day- Jan. 2007
5 yr. LTA
Reconciled.


Posts: 3139 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: NJ
Laura28
♀ Member
Member # 28997
Default  Posted: 2:49 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi all

This is especially for LookingforLove. Happy Valentines Day honey

This is for all my other wonderful friends on SI. Love you all - Happy Valentines

Love

Laura

[This message edited by Laura28 at 2:50 AM, February 14th (Monday)]


Married 30yrs Me BW 57Yrs Him FWH 59yrs
OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted.
Dday May 28 2010.
OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA til dday).
OW2 2002(8yrs PA).
OW3 2009(1Yr PA).
Others???? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck the goat"

Posts: 2729 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Australia
Laura28
♀ Member
Member # 28997
Default  Posted: 2:57 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi all

Not to put a damper on the day but we don't celebrate Valentines in our house. Haven't done so for the last 22 years.

I told H many years ago this was never to happen. The baby from my miscarriage (on that night he left me alone to visit OWzero) was due on the 14th of February. I busted them together and he said they were "just friends" and I bought it. That baby was due today and would have been 22. If it was a girl we were going to call her Laura - hence my screen name. I now believe OWzero was actually his first OW. He claims she wasn't but I am 100% sure she was an EA if not a PA. Why otherwise would you leave your wife sobbing alone on the night she found out she had miscarried????

So V day is not a day for celebration for me. Please don't be sad for me. I'm Ok really. It's 8pm on V day here in Aussie land and I haven't shed a single tear and don't plan to.

By the time most of you read this it will be over for me. Perhaps you could wish me a very happy "Unvalentine's Day"

Hope your spouses are good to you all on V day. They should really step up!

Love to you all

Laura

[This message edited by Laura28 at 3:08 AM, February 14th (Monday)]


Married 30yrs Me BW 57Yrs Him FWH 59yrs
OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted.
Dday May 28 2010.
OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA til dday).
OW2 2002(8yrs PA).
OW3 2009(1Yr PA).
Others???? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck the goat"

Posts: 2729 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Australia
UKgirl
♀ Member
Member # 17062
Default  Posted: 3:07 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Happy Valentine’s Day, however you plan to spend it, make sure you do what is right for YOU.

My BFF suggested last week that I buy myself some flowers

Send the flowers to yourself to make yourself feel better. To remind yourself that you deserve good things in your life.
Brilliant idea and now this is JUST what I plan to do for myself. I don’t CARE that the prices will be stupid – I want some flowers for ME. So when I do my supermarket shop, I will be sure to pick a pretty bunch, or two, or three.

VDay is an odd day for me. We never “did” VDay. And then I found out why – it was something special between WH and MOW. I have never found out why it was so special, when pressed he just denied and said the usual crap about commercialism. It was a date when they would be together and if it fell at the weekend, they would find a date as near as possible. But this year H will be at his SIL’s funeral. It is also his brother and SIL’s wedding anniversary, they would have been married 35yrs today. So a strange day all round in this house.

Sister – welcome to our LTA house. You will find all the support you need from this wonderful sheltered corner of SI. I read your profile and you certainly seem to have one crazy OW, probably made more crazy after her BH’s death. But never mind about her. She is of no consequence now.

njgal, I truly believe that if you have asked for the whole truth, a timeline, dates, etc then that is exactly what the WS should provide. I honestly think that my H’s TT, poor memory, minimising, belittling and squashing down has done the very opposite to healing. It has left gaping wounds that won’t heal – great big scars running across my very soul. And today is yet another example. What was special? “Nothing”. He is never going to tell on that one. My first attempt at getting the truth was two weeks after dday. I took him to a pub, sat him down and said I wanted him to tell me everything he could remember from the first moment to the most recent. He lied. He minimised. He gave some vague outline while missing out months at a time. He had said they saw each other infrequently – just a few times a year. And it went on from there. He would only admit to things I found out and then it was “oh, yeah. But that was the only time…..” which it never was, of course. And yes, I also felt violated when I found out all the things she knew about me. All the little things. Ugh.

Okay. Try and have a good day everyone.


D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 56 y/o Him, WS, 57 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 18 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.

Posts: 3328 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
UKgirl
♀ Member
Member # 17062
Default  Posted: 3:12 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((Laura))))) I’m so sorry about your baby. And that this is a sad day for you. I can’t believe your WH did that!!! Sheesh.

Lovely flower pics! Shall I put them on the verandah?


D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 56 y/o Him, WS, 57 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 18 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.

Posts: 3328 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
Laura28
♀ Member
Member # 28997
Default  Posted: 3:19 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Uk

yes that would be lovely


laura


Married 30yrs Me BW 57Yrs Him FWH 59yrs
OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted.
Dday May 28 2010.
OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA til dday).
OW2 2002(8yrs PA).
OW3 2009(1Yr PA).
Others???? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck the goat"

Posts: 2729 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Australia
Laura28
♀ Member
Member # 28997
Default  Posted: 3:36 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

UK

Didn't read your previous post before I replied. I am so sorry you have bad associations with this day too.

These are just for you

BIG hugs.

Laura

[This message edited by Laura28 at 3:38 AM, February 14th (Monday)]


Married 30yrs Me BW 57Yrs Him FWH 59yrs
OWzero 1988 EA?/PA? Gaslighted.
Dday May 28 2010.
OW1 1994(6mths PA, EA til dday).
OW2 2002(8yrs PA).
OW3 2009(1Yr PA).
Others???? Status: Not Divorcing..but.."You can't unfuck the goat"

Posts: 2729 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Australia
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 6:01 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Good Morning.

Laura: Happy Unvalentines Day to you! Thank you for the flowers as I'm sure this will be my only token today. And, I'm sorry about the baby you miscarried. I seriously cannot believe how many of y ou here on SI had such tragic things occur to you and had to go through them alone, as well. Again, I'm sorry, but glad to see that you otherwise seem ok today.

LookingforLove: I still haven't read your profile (ETA- just looked at it and even tho 1 of your interest are "writing" you didn't write anything in your profile, lol), but I would not engage in any kind of game playing. He is with OW for whatever reason. That makes him an a-hole. Buy yourself the flowers, but I would not be coy about the source. He's not going to beleive you've moved on to the point where someone would be giving you flowers so quickly. And, I think someone in your H's state of mind would pity you for it. But, buy them if it makes you happy. I've thought of doing that as well, especially when I saw all the men out there last night scrambling for flowers and gifts, made me sad cuz I know I'm not going to celebrate Valentine's this year. But, should he ask, just tell him either it's none of his business or you saw them and bought them, depending on your mood. And- why do you keep avoiding your home? I realize you don't want to be near him - but you are making this way too easy for him.

So, my H has wished me a Happy Valentine's Day today this morning and I replied the same. And, he said something like "that was really heartfelt". I seriously do not understand what he is thinking. We are not speaking while we are apart other than need to know. At home, most days we are cordial but spend no time together, since I am doing stuff with the kids and his ass is glued to the couch.
So, what does he think I have to celebrate today? Just weird.
Last night he rented a movie and asked me to join him (which I did for parts of it), then after the movie, he starts telling me all about his day, etc., then starts asking me if I have another girl's night planned.

So, I see the wheels are turning in his head.

Anyway, I'm bummed today. Nice sunset this morning tho. I'm taking that as a sign that everything will be ok.

I hope the rest of you find peace and happiness today as well. I plan on spending the day with the people I love the most and who will always love me: my kids.

[This message edited by Allgoodnamesgone at 6:21 AM, February 14th (Monday)]


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 6:32 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi Tribe

Welcome Milk...sorry you are here. I read your profile. I too think OW is a POS.

Laura - I'm glad you are feeling better.

(((ats)))

DIP is #ONE!!!

I think since it's Valentine's Day, that EVERYONE should love themselves today. Be kind to yourself and try to find some peace. Move the shit thoughts out of your mind, even for just this day. That's my goal for the day.

Hugs to everyone! My thoughts are with you!


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 7:52 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just wanted to drop in and wish everyone a stress-free, pain-free day. For me, this is one of the hardest holidays to acknowledge. Our hearts have been shattered by their heartless actions and we spend years trying to put the pieces back together. Seriously, Happy Valentine's Day - no, not a holiday I'd like to acknowledge.
I spent yesterday at the card store trying to find at least one card that could say honestly how I feel and, as I'm sure each of you who also tried, there was not a one. Well maybe Tryn & NJGal could find one.
Laura, thank you for the beautiful flowers. I am so happy to see you feeling so much better. I can't imagine how difficult last week was for you but you are one strong woman with a wonderful sense of humor. You are doing beautifully.
Thanks too for all the beautiful pictures. They really do brighten our little corner here on SI.

Looking - a warm welcome to you. I think buying yourself flowers is a wonderful idea but I have to agree with Allgood's post. She made some excellent points.
Allgood - do you think your H will come home with some flowers or a card or some acknowledgement? If not, is it because he's never done this before or because he's being an ass?
It's kind of a catch 22 for these guys. If they bring us something, there's little pleasure in it for us, at least for me, but if they don't, all hell breaks loose.
So I got my card, candy and I found the email confirming flowers for today and I feel nothing. I remember too many years where I know he did the same for her as he was doing for me. Once he gave me a card that was clearly intended for her (he signed it using the name they called him in the office) so I guess she got my card. It wasn't until after d-day that I thought back on that card and it became clear what he had done. I think of him standing there buying one card for me and one for his fuckbuddy and to this day it still infuriates me.
What an asshole.
Warning vent coming so please feel free not to continue reading.
I just want this day to be over with. It's a fucking insult to be called a Valentine when you've been treated like shit.
So sorry for this vent but I've been in a very bad place lately. There are times when I just want to run away where no one can find me and try to get my head together.
Nell - You wrote exactly how I feel.
Tribe, I'm sad today. I feel very separated from people who love me. . . and I'm very disappointed to have no one to cry on.

I just have to add that I am missing my sister very badly lately. She was the one I always ran to when I was sad.
I have to apologize for not being very supportive lately. I read everyone's stories and I get so angry that so many of us are hurting so badly. What is wrong with these people? How can they do the things they do and then think we should just "get over it" and move on? How is it that people with no heart find those of us with huge hearts and instead of learning from us to love and cherish one another, make choices that break our hearts into pieces?
Vent over!
So because I don't want to end on such a negative thought, here is my wish for all of you. I wish that you will find peace and comfort in the love that is in your life. I wish that your heart is on the mend and that someone, your children, your sister, mother, friend and even your spouse will do one kind, loving act that will restore your belief in the goodness of the people in your life.
Hugs to the tribe.


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 8:08 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, let us just get past today and move on.

A week or so ago, FWW made plans for lunch today with friends. She has a nail appointment this evening, and she left before I got up this morning to work weight watchers; I will see her when she gets home tonight after her nail appointment, and we will order Chinese (her request). This morning she called and asked me if she should cancel lunch with her friends to have lunch with me, better an after-thought than not thought of at all I guess. I told her to keep her plans. I am really running out of steam on this relationship.

Last night she texted good night to me from the bedroom. So I texted back, how dysfunctional are we? She will never make any overt move to fix things or take any action out of fear of rejection. It is all on my shoulders; only I am getting comfortable with the pack off.


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 8:26 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

She will never make any overt move to fix things or take any action out of fear of rejection

This is so characteristic of our LTA S's. Weird when you think of how many similar traits our S's share, whether male or female. What's that book that Tryn is always talking about?? Yep, this one is in that book.
ATS - I hope you have something planned for yourself today that you enjoy. Maybe a little golf, or a day out on your boat. Do something special to remind yourself that you're the good guy.
Hugs to the tribe!


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 8:35 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A LTA is really a killer because they made the same choice over and over again for YEARS! With the same woman. She must have meant something, right?

Milkshake - Welcome to our little corner. I hope you don't mind but I found this quote in your profile and wanted to comment on it.
This is definitely one of the biggest hurdles to overcome as a BS of a LTA cheater. There is no way they can convince us that someone they f'd for years meant nothing, no matter how many times they try to convince us. Just last night I asked my H once again, What did she mean to you? And of course his reply was, Nothing, she was just a tramp, someone he used because it was easy. Well I don't know whether to be horrified with that response or relieved, if you KWIM. On the one hand, if that is how he really felt then he is a very callous person. On the other, it would kill me to think that he did love this woman and couldn't find it in his power to end the relationship until he was given an ultimatum.
Anyway, again, welcome. I hope you find the comfort and wisdom here you will need as you go through the numerous stages of recovery.


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 9:09 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sister Milkshake --

Howdy!

Yes, the OW is twisted. Not to one-up you, but I've lived through worse. You'll see.

Anyway, it still sucks. At the end of the day, awful is awful.

You're going to be just fine. You really are.

At least you're confident the A is over. That's totally great. It makes everything easier.

Do you have anyone else in your life that you love or have loved, a man? I'm just wondering. I mean, I HOPE WH loves/loved OW, because it's damn pointless to have damged our family and hurt me so bad had he not.

And, I must say in all honesty that I still love my XH. Of course I do. We were together 11 years. Longer than WH and I have been together. We were married on Valentine's Day and today would have been our 13th anniversary.

I remember OW once said to me that you can love two men at the same time. Well, sort of. To me, there are no "true loves". BUT, love is an action as well as a feeling and if you're "loving" two men at the same time, you're certainly not doing it right.

Shortly after Dday I wanted nothing more than to just show up on XH's doorstep and curl up to lick my wounds. I know he would have said stay as long as you want. But, instead I remained NC with him. He had a girlfriend. My marriage was in shambles, but I AM married. It wouldn't have been right. And not disrupting his life is the loving thing to do for him, and not running away when the shit hits the fan is the loving thing to do for my WH.

Anway, I'm rambling.

LTA is hard. But did he love her? Maybe, maybe not. I have no idea which is worse.
Part of me believes that to be capable of LTA you must be so limited that you can't actually love anyone properly.


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 9:19 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Milkshake, I would like to follow-up on the quote fnf posted up.

...they made the same choice over and over again for YEARS! With the same woman. She must have meant something, right?

My FWW meant nothing more to her last OM than ego stroking and sex. She was younger than he, and more attractive and fit than he or his BS. She can be very sensual when she wants to. They met each other’s needs. He talked to her on the phone, took her to lunch, bought her upgrades when they travelled together, and told her how wonderful she was and how I did not appreciate what a wonderful wife I had. In exchange, she went to events with him and met for sex once a month or so where she had vocal orgasms from intercourse and oral sex and made him feel like a real man. That was it, and neither wanted anything more.

Compare that to FWW's previous OM. He was single and over time fell in lurv with FWW. He wanted more and more time with her, he wanted her to leave me and move in with him. He became "needy" and "demanding" as FWW has put it and she became irritated with him. He wanted a real relationship, and so she found someone else.

The LTA indicates the people involved want to have a specific need met. I do not believe that a LTA can sustain itself if there is any real emotional (love, desire) for the OP. FWW says there was a time she was infatuated with the first OM and wanted to be with him, but that passed as the relationship developed and she got to know the real him. She NEVER felt infatuation or love for the last OM. He was a means to an end, and that is why they were able to sustain a relationship for over 3 years until dday. After dday they both went NC immediately and it has held. He has never fished, I would know. There was not love or affection, she was his fuck-buddy and he was her sugar daddy.

--Ats

Oh, and welcome to LTA

ETA: m334455, we cross-posted.

Part of me believes that to be capable of LTA you must be so limited that you can't actually love anyone properly.

Just what I said, but much more succinct.

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 9:21 AM, February 14th (Monday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
forgivenotforget
♀ Member
Member # 11053
Default  Posted: 9:53 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I do not believe that a LTA can sustain itself if there is any real emotional (love, desire) for the OP.

ATS - I would love for you to say a little bit more about this. In my way of thinking, I cannot believe a LTA can sustain itself if there is NOT an emotional connection. Please help me to see this from a male perspective.


D-day - 12/23/05 LTA - 8 years.
"Love's a matter of trust and I just want to believe in us." M McBride

Posts: 1901 | Registered: Jun 2006 | From: A tunnel where I'm beginning to see the light
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 9:55 AM, February 14th (Monday), 2011View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

UKgirl.

How did you get those pictures of my vacation home?

Milk.

Welcome. I like milkshakes. Chocolate is the best. I agree with the others. that OW is a POS.

Tribe. I want to wish all my wonderful female type friends here at the LTA house a happy Valentines day. To you men, well I don't know if it is proper for guys to wish guys a happy V day. I do hope you all have a good day though.

I think that this day and wedding anniversary day is the most difficult card to buy. Does anyone make a "happy V day you, fuckin, cheatn, bitch/bastard?" That card would be a great one to set the mood.

Thanks to those who noticed I was #1. It took a lot of effort to get that ranking.

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


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