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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long Term Affair Part 21
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 4:23 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ATS - your wife definately affaired down. What the hell was she thinking? OM2 is horrid! You are an amazing man and you have helped me more than you know with your posts. I feel like I can't express myself properly so I don't post as eliquently as the rest of the tribe. I lurk a lot!

Thanks for sharing.


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 4:25 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ats: I couldn't see the OM pics first time around.

OM2 is horrid
!

Tryn: nice "do".


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 4:29 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

DeepP... sent you a PM...

Not to worry.. I will comment but keep private.

about this thread though.. only about a dozen of us here… For some reason, I don't think anybody we know could ever find us... lol


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 4:30 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

tryn - you are so much fun....and I love fun...Love the pic.

You are awesome!!


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 4:43 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Nofun.. Your H is an idiot... I just saw OW..

Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
UKgirl
♀ Member
Member # 17062
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

STOP POSTING PERSONAL INFORMATION!!

[This message edited by Deeply Scared at 8:19 AM, December 22nd (Wednesday)]


D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 56 y/o Him, WS, 57 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 18 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.

Posts: 3328 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
njgal480
♀ Member
Member # 24938
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh my gosh! I am just speechless!
Why is this always the pattern?
M33- you are beautiful. Baby Paddy with Santa-adorable! It looks like a classic painting!
But.. the OW.... the opposite of sexy ...she looks so frumpy! That is the only word for her.
You, even in that smaller pic. exude sexiness, beauty, etc.
Do you think that's what it is? That the spouse is seen as too good for the WS and so..they must affair down?

Ats... speechless... you are a good looking dude... and the 2nd OM... Oh my gosh..someone else said horrid! and I agree. I could only see that top of the bald head of OM#1 but I can imagine what the rest of him looks like!

Nofun....once again... you MUST be kidding me. That OW.. I don't even know how to describe her... frumpy, flabby, not sexy at all....and you.... you look like a movie star compared to that frump! you are beautiful!

ImNell....you are gorgeous! and..you have a beautiful family!

Tryin- Your OM has a very arrogant look about him. Is he an arrogant kind of guy? full of himself?

I have to try to figure out how to do this... to send you guys a pic of my husband's snagglepuss OW.

But... geez... it is true what they say.. they do affair down.
definitely when it comes to morals and ethics etc. but...it appears that they affair down when it comes to looks also!
Is it all due to low self esteem?
That they just go for the first person that flatters them?

I saw forgivenot forgets OW and that is definitely a beauty and the beast situation also...with FNF being the beauty and the OW definitely is this hefty beast.
wow...is all I can say.

Thanks for sharing.

Now.. who can explain to me how to post a pic and how to poof! it later?


Me- BS
Him- WH
Long term marriage
D-day- Jan. 2007
5 yr. LTA
Reconciled.


Posts: 3139 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: NJ
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 5:03 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi all,
<snip>
I remember thinking early after dday when I measured myself against these guys, "How much of an asshole must I be for her to be finding happiness with them?" Of course now I understand it was not about me.

njgal480.

Do you think that's what it is? That the spouse is seen as too good for the WS and so..they must affair down?

FWW said a lot after dday that she never felt good enough for me. She felt guilty for having kids from another M, for not having enough sex drive. Of course, that was all her messed up thinking.

UKgirl, I remember seeing your pictures. Even with the photo work, your OW does not hold a candle to you.

--Ats

ETA, nice looking kids DP, and I love your hair style

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 8:32 AM, December 22nd (Wednesday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
UKgirl
♀ Member
Member # 17062
Default  Posted: 5:07 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Grrrr!!!! FWH appeared over my shoulder and saw the photobucket page. Yeh, well. Whatever.

I cannot believe, honestly cannot believe, these OP’s. WTF were the WS’s thinking of??? Every photo has been of a lovely BS. I know if we met IRL we’d not only have tons in common (obviously!!) but we would find we are genuinely nice folk.

M33 – you are gorgeous. Laura, sorry, your H is a fuckwit. Tryn’, I think you already know my opinion – and now I’ve seen the photos…… FFS! Nell – what can I say. >>>>shaking head<<<<<

And on that note, I’m off to bed. DS22 +gf are here tomorrow, my parents and the IL’s the day after (weather permitting) and I have a WHOLE LOAD of stuff to do, including taking DS16 to the mall in the morning (arrgghh!!). And then – well, you wimmins will KWIM.

I’m sorry that I haven’t been able to catch up. I’ve been kinda lurking, intending to, but FWH has been home due to the snow, so……. Okay, Love y’all! (((((tribe))))))


ETA
Of course now I understand it was not about me.
EXACTLY.

[This message edited by UKgirl at 5:10 PM, December 21st (Tuesday)]


D-Day: 30 July 2006 LTA: 5yrs
Me, BS, 56 y/o Him, WS, 57 y/o
MOW, pathetic ex-fiancee.
3 grown boys and one 18 y/o
I don't consider myself married anymore.
There are some words once spoken split the world in two. Before you say them and after.

Posts: 3328 | Registered: Nov 2007 | From: UK
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 5:11 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

DeepP.. How can your W give up on you and your beautiful family? Makes no sense? but what the hell.. it's selfishness... You W has lost her way in life... You don't lose yours! You have some kids to make sure they turn out to be good people.

njgal480..Unfortunately, I see my W’s OM on tv commercials… He’s a PI attorney… To say he’s full of himself is an understatement.. It is what it is....

[This message edited by trynhard at 5:14 PM, December 21st (Tuesday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
deeppurple
♂ Member
Member # 28757
Default  Posted: 5:27 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ats - I've been working on the hair for a while - not sure which way to brush anymore.

Tryn - selfish - at least she has admitted privately. She is way way lost - hoping she can find a way back sometime soon.


Me - BS 49
Her - WS 43
Married 16 yrs (together 17 yrs)
DD13 DS10 DS8 DS6
DDay 1 6.4.2010 dday 2 7.25.2010
Heading for divorce.
"Never look down on someone unless you are helping them up"

Posts: 522 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Where the sun is shining & the surf is pumping
ImNellNow
♀ Member
Member # 28753
Default  Posted: 5:49 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Everyone,
I love you all and I'm so happy to have faces to the words posted here.

XOXOXO - Nell

Now, as to the affairing down issue:
My WH affaired down FROM HIM. So that he could feel better about himself in comparison to his AP. I've seen this in other areas of life. WH does the dishes and says, "I bet your sister's husband doesn't do the dishes" = I am better than that guy who is a rung below me on this particular ladder so I'm not going anywhere. That's his way of feeling like he is okay. It's sad. And I feel sorry for him for that. You can always find someone better than you at X, and always find someone worse than you at Y, but if you are doing the best Z you can, you can be truly proud of yourself!

Did that sound horribly Pollyanna-ish?

ETA: UKgirl,
Haloes of light always appear in photos. That second one of frumpy OW was definitely not retouched.

[This message edited by ImNellNow at 5:51 PM, December 21st (Tuesday)]


BS & D
Drinking wine and thinking bliss is on the other side of this.

Posts: 2370 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Baby steps on my new path
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 6:26 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

"How much of an asshole must I be for her to be finding happiness with them?"

I still think this. How horrible am I that my H stooped lower than whale shit.

On the other hand, H has such low self esteem that he took up with such a douche bag that has the same low self esteem. Plus I think she gave good blow jobs.

UKgirl - OW is still gross even if you think that photo was air brushed. Yuk Yuk Yuk...

This was good therapy for me. I had a few laughs and realized that our spouses are out of their minds.

Actually, we are the best of the best. It's just sad that our spouses ruined the one thing in their lives that truly was sacred, honest and wholesome. I am trying to make the best of what is left. It's the most difficult thing I will ever have to do and at that I don't know if it's going to work.

Thank you tribe!


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 6:42 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Ok - as I'm slightly paranoid that many of my clients may be on this site, you need to pm me for the photobucket link.

This seriously has made my day.
Thanks for sharing everyone!


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 6:58 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nofun,
Plus I think she gave good blow jobs.

I know FWW did.


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 7:17 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

wow, such beautiful families...such ugly, truely fugly op's.......

yup more confirmation, affair'd down....

how do you post a link?...for some reason when it comes to pictures i have not a clue what i am doing...


ukgirl: it was nice to hear from you....you have been missed....

having a lousy day in the miracle house today...manchild and school...i really think there should be some kind of law that progress notes, report cards ...things like that cannot go out to homes just before holidays....it just sets a bad tone....not that my tone was any better prior to this....bad season for me...seeing as it is now attached to d-day for me...oh well...

tried my new favorite quote today..."it is what it is and it will become what you make it"...its not working on this one.... ...teenagers....aye..


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 7:55 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I really think there should be some kind of law that progress notes, report cards ...things like that cannot go out to homes just before holidays....

My exact thought as I opened the mail today....


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
ImNellNow
♀ Member
Member # 28753
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You know what's fun? Spangly bras worn as shirts paired with skin tight hotpants. Classy. So classy that it makes the other people in your vicinity shield their eyes. I'm just sayin'.


BS & D
Drinking wine and thinking bliss is on the other side of this.

Posts: 2370 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Baby steps on my new path
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 9:36 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

STOP POSTING PERSONAL INFORMATION!!

[This message edited by Deeply Scared at 8:20 AM, December 22nd (Wednesday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
lostsuol
♀ Member
Member # 13706
Default  Posted: 10:18 PM, December 21st (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a photo fest! Thanks for sharing. It certainly shows that looks aren't the attraction for an AP. Affair down... for sure. I don't have a picture of OW but there is an old one at FWHs workplace, a collage of staff pix over the years, that has been on display at their annual open house every year since Dday. At least this year it wasn't front & center on the buffet table. We met at a company dinner (more than 10 yrs ago) or another staff party but I doubt that I'd recognize her now. I rarely go to his office & FWH has made sure we didn't cross paths after Dday whenever seasonal help was there.

I still have a lot of Christmas 'prep' waiting so I'd better get to it.

I'd like to see Deep's and AGNG's pix. would you pm me the links please?

Unlurking but sending hugs...


Posts: 808 | Registered: Feb 2007 | From: Canada
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