SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I've learned so much over the past 2 weeks about my marriage. My WH has been so helpful in showing me how things really are. For example,

1. I never loved him.

2. I am trying to make this way more of a conflict than it needs to be. There doesn't need to be any drama surrounding the end of a 14 year marriage and a 16 year relationship that involves a child. Why have conflict??

3. He isn't going to cry about this because HE is going to live his life with JOY and not be miserable...and he's A MAN, so he's certainly not going to cry about it in front of me, for heavens sakes.

4. I never supported him and I wasn't nurturing to his son, the (now) 21 yr old criminal (when i say criminal I mean he cheats, steals, manipulates and oh, he also sexually molested at least 2 little girls)

5. I never had sex enough with him. Well and when I did have it enough with him, it just wasn't that good.

6. He took offense to me saying I hoped he wouldn't try to cheat me in the divorce. My gosh, he couldn't believe I would imply such a thing! If anything HE will be the one who gets cheated in all this.

7. He really wishes he hadn't told me about the physical cheating he did in 2003, because THAT really was the cheating, the 7 years that followed of Craigslist, Ashley Madison, Adult Friend Finder, Match.com, Yahoo personals, MySpace (and goodness knows what else) ... oh and trying to pick up a waitress WHEN HE WAS OUT WITH ME wasn't necessarily cheating. I may believe it was wrong, but it wasn't cheating.

SERIOUSLY???????

I'm bumping this post up because I didn't include a REAL question in it before. I guess I want to know if I am the only person who has heard such bullcrap come out of a Wayward, Soon to be Ex's mouth...I mean, the man makes me want to beat my head against the wall and I am an educated, intelligent, kind woman...but I feel like a fleck of dirt on a fly's ass when I am around him!!!

oh good grief. yeah this is classic blame shifting so he can give himself permission to "move on"

((emerald))

the things that WH has decided are "his truth" about me and the last 16 years are similar.

It's weirdly comforting how similar all of the WS seem to be...and weirdly disturbing at the same time.

It's like they have been in a completely different marriage; and that makes me wonder, is this the fantasy marriage they are trying to achieve, or are they going to always feel this way because they are searching for something/someone outside of themselves...this is where we ask ourselves "how much more can we possibly give without receiving what we need in return?"

Apparently we have the same faults. Do they ever come up with anything knew?

this is where we ask ourselves "how much more can we possibly give without receiving what we need in return?"

I have reflected on this so much the last few months. But it is never about us, only them.

*sigh* This is straight from the WS handbook. Word for word (well, almost.)

While you are not alone in this, I realize that gives you little comfort. I'm sorry you had to hear this drivel. You deserve so much better.

its very similar.. sound exactly what people have been expierencing here for years..

maybe suggest him a movie called shutter island.. which is great movie and shows a man living in a fantasy world.. but hey, he need to be highly intelligent 'to get' it :)

Yep.

Same here.

He was never original, so I expect him to default to the WS handbook.

Just realize it for what it is:

Idiots trying to justify the evil they have become.

Rat Bastard even started to rewrite his relationship with DS17, even painting his own son as a bad guy.

I couldn't believe my ears.

Moron.

That is when I realized this man is a total, complete fuck up. And that anything coming out of his mouth are lies.

He is just a walking-talking work of fiction as far as I am concerned.

I just wanted to add, yes heard the same crap. I also think anyone who trolls for hook ups on craigslist, or Ashley Madison, or the like ought to just brand themselves stupid cheater on the forehead. Save the rest of us a lot of trouble.

Yes to all.

Xwh was trolling for sex on sexyads.com and wayn.com, yahoo personals. Women as well as men for "early morning bj's." Yes that is actually what the one ad of his said. He keeps telling anyone who would listen we didn't have sex enough. Is once or twice a week not enough? guess not for a possible SA like him.

Therefore he "HAD" to cheat. I didn't "act like a wife". He actually believes this and OW actually believes this too. It's kinda like "oh I don't feel I have enough money in my bank account so I "HAVE" to rob a bank." What kind of fucked up shit logic is that? I mean really.

Now he's angry at ME for divorcing HIM?

Someone punch that stupid son of a bitch in his rotten from-dick-sucking-and-ice-crunching teeth. I hope they break off from the impact and go down his throat where he chokes on them. Eat a word sandwich now you stupid piece of shit FT xwh.

Mine too. Its all my fault that he had the affairs.I must have typed the online profiles at adult friend finder and alt.com. It was due to my jealous and controlling ways that he had to find his whore for support on FB. It was due to my anxiety and how horrible i made his life with me.

He has re-written the whole marriage. he blames me for ruining his relationship with his step daughter. you know the one who found his cell that he texted his i love you to ow on? But i ruined it. I made him unhappy for almost 10 years.

It sickens me....

They all do sound similiar dont they? They all re-write the history to justify thier actions? Mine even went a found a mental health counselor who supported his leaving the marriage cuz god knows im really the "crazy" one...