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I Can Relate     Print Topic    
User Topic: Long Term Affair Part 19
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 9:16 AM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Where am I? What am I up to? Me? Quiet?

Yes, all good questions.

I'm fine. Eerie calm.

New IC wants to see me again today so I'm heading over that way around lunchtime.

Bigger kids are at camp. Only the babes at home.

Yesterday was my anniversary. It was fine. Tonight my sister is performing and I'm going to see that with WH.

All I'm doing right now is keeping my mind open to my new IC's perspective.

I feel a little cold, emotionally. Detached. Thank God. I've been working on becoming detached for nearly a year. I'm glad I'm finally making progress.

ETA --

ATS you're doing fine. Don't worry about not being attracted to your wife right now. She's done some remarkably unattractive things. Hopefully it's temporary.

Dip -- colorful phrase. I'll add it to my collection

I hope to be more helpful later in the week. ((tribe))

[This message edited by m334455 at 9:20 AM, August 10th (Tuesday)]


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
honesttoafault
♀ Member
Member # 27105
Default  Posted: 10:36 AM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M3: I'm glad that you seem to like the new IC. Sometimes someone new can see a different perspective to a situation and help us with get better insights.

Paper Roses:

Sometimes it is too hard to fight my way up from the bottom of the pool of disbelief.

Very well said!! It is also a whirlpool that got us sucked in to that bottom with dday and TT! We were drowning and don't even know which way was up.
Fear can be become the new emotion that we are used to living with. We want and need some kind of security and the changes that have happened in our lives make us desperate to hold on to something, anything that we feel some sort of control over, even if it's fear.

Allgood: LOL, I'll have to get a copyright for my story! It is all too unreal. What do they say? Truth is stranger than fiction?

I guess that is why I have such trouble with this. It is too unreal. Too much. At least with xWH, it was an "exit affair", fairly typical, still extremely painful, but not something that was rare that noone had ever heard of or gone through. Knowing that still didn't help the hurt, but I knew I wasn't alone, there were many others who went through somewhat similar circumstances.

Here with LTA, OC's, NPD, bigamy/affair, etc, the perfect storm of all that's bad and cruel plus, it's very hard to deal with. It's like being in a train wreck or plane crash, etc. So many times I just want to go in a corner and curl myself up in a ball and cry. I try to get up and start to sift through stuff, just to clear a path out of the devastation, only to be confronted with trigger like a cruel demented jack-in-the-box rearing its ugly head that brings me to my knees again.

Everyone here has been like a light that really helps me through some of the darkest passages when all the rubble landslides on me and I try to scratch and crawl my way out.

There were many times when I was under a cascade of fallen debris and just wanted to lie there and give up....but you guys have literally saved me and I can't thank each and everyone of you enough.

Everything has helped, from a virtual hug, getting angry for me, great advice, and simply support and caring.

I am not through yet. I hope I can help where I can. Thank you all for the help with the journey through Mordor.

{{{{tribe}}}}}


Posts: 1903 | Registered: Jan 2010
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 1:17 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

honest: your love for lord of the rings is showing... ....

you are doing well honest, as well as you can with what you have...and the more you have on your side the better you will do.....so did you book that test you need to take??? ...remember when i told you i can be a pest...well i am exercising it....book that test asap....unless of course you did???


m3: i hope you are faring well with ic today...i go tonite...and i envy that detachment....i have a good deal of it, but greedily i want more of it...i want to be able to be in a place where i no longer have the fustration and anger..

as for sex with others...i have had my share of sexual experiences...as well as sizes....2 things i know for sure...when its really small, size for me matters (too big is not that great either)..and sex when you have that passionate spark is the best sex i ever had....was he the best lover, no...but the feelings that went with it created an amazing sex life...at least it had for me...obviously not for him....i want that again, not with him but with someone...i want more then just sex...i want the whole package because that is when its really better then good...although at this point i would settle for good too ........


honest:

I'm scared of writing that list, afraid of letting loose all of that anger.

what exactly are you scared of?..name the fear


roses: i completely understand that you cannot trust him yet...but do you trust yourself?...do you trust yourself enough to know when something is not right, when you need to leave, or even stay...can you let go of trusting in him and learn instead to trust yourself to pick up on lies, deceit and lack of transparancy....


i guess what i am trying to say is that instead of trying to force trust in him, how about learning to trust yourself, your instincts, your common sense....let whatever happens for trusting him just be for now...let him earn it, and in the meanwhile learn how to trust you....not sure if i am making sense...


allgood: have you tried telling him phrases and actions that you need to hear and see when you have these talks that he dreads...letting him know that if he uses them they will help allay your fears, or give you the support you are needing at the time....sometimes we really need to spell it out for them, letter by letter...kind of like studying for a spelling test...one letter at a time...


(((tribe)))


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 1:34 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hey all.

Miracle: This is exactly what led up to me sleeping on the couch last night: I said I just need for you to reassure me and comfort me. And he said.....(crickets).... So, then I kicked it up a notch: "I seriously don't know why, if you love someone, it's so hard to comfort them when they are in pain." And he said: (....nothing....). So, off I went.

I guess I needed to spell out he should tell me he loves me, he was a fool, he's not sorry enough? I did tell him that if he fell to the ground disgusted with himself, I might think he means it (or something like that - I was babbling for large sections of these conversations) and he said "have you ever seen me do anything like that?"
Um... no... that's why it might look sincere.

Anyway - I don't want to tell him what to say, cuz it won't mean anything to me if I have to hand him a script.

I sent him a big fat ugly text this morning when I told him, amongst other things, I am in too much pain to be "in love with him". I think he told me he would have to work on that. (Bad cell connection).

I believe, however, that he has used up his "I will try harder" allowances for the year.

BTW- my afternoon may be opening up for a quick fly by - I'll call you tomorrow.


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 1:38 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

allgood: for everyone "comfort" is different...does he really know what you need for you to feel comforted?...not giving him the words but tell him what you want to hear...like i need reassurances, i need words of love, i need you to express remorse, i need you to offer to watch the kids, i need you touch me and hold me, etc...the list is endless...comfort is different for everyone...

and a "fly by" would be awesome...


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 2:25 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Anyway - I don't want to tell him what to say, cuz it won't mean anything to me if I have to hand him a script.

I know we cannot expect people to be mind readers, but I so understand what Allgood is saying here. At one point in my career, I wrote work specifications. In doing this, I learned you can provide schedules, performance criteria, references, and a list of acceptable materials. After that, the contractor MUST possess the skill necessary to implement the work. You simply cannot write for every contingency and situation.

I encourage FWW to tell me how she feels, and to act and do how she feels and wants to in any moment. If what she says or is does, is a problem for me I will let her know. If we cannot resolve it, we can divorce. I tell her the things I like, she knows that my love languages are touch and quality time. What I cannot do is give her a detailed: …if this then that… list of behaviors in anticipation of everything that may occur.

M334455, thanks for the encouragement, and I am glad to read you are in a comfortable place for now.


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
m334455
♀ Member
Member # 26893
Default  Posted: 5:07 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

"Not Afraid" -- Eminem

I'm not afraid to take a stand
Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road

And I just can't keep living this way
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, Imma face my demons
I'm manning up, Imma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now

IC was great. One more session just me next week. Then he would like WH to come. That's about it. I'm just following this guy's lead for now. :)


BW 38, 5 kids
Dday Dec. 2009

Posts: 4034 | Registered: Dec 2009
Allgoodnamesgone
♀ Member
Member # 26157
Default  Posted: 5:50 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

M3: that's my son's favorite song (right now).


Me- BS
DDay- 8/26/09
Separated after failed R effort.

Posts: 2165 | Registered: Nov 2009
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 8:19 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

allgood - I read your posts and can't believe how much your H is like mine. Jesus..you sure they aren't brothers?

I did muster up enough courage to sit in front of him with HIS computer and show him all the sites he visited...including looking for the OW. He said he is bored in work and that is what the guys "do". They look at porn, they go to these social networking sites, and yes...he was trying to get info on OW. For no particular reason....just because...and then he shut down and wouldn't talk. I told him how scared this made me feel, how it sets me back to think that he is pining over OW. I started to cry. I always feel so all alone at these moments when I need him the most. He never moved from his spot, never said another word. He stares into space like I don't exist. He just doesn't speak, he shuts down. Doesn't try to comfort, nothing...and I must say...why would he change...he's always been this way. So Allgood...your H isn't going to change either. It is what it is...I either have to accept it or divorce the bastard.


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
iwantamiracle
♀ Member
Member # 22812
Default  Posted: 8:30 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((fun))))))

oh fun i am so sorry he is such an idiot....and an idiot he is....


ats while i agree that you cannot tell them every single step...you can tell them the basics....none of them so it seems even know the basics...

it would seem that they are all idiots...


i am taking my life back, one step at a time!!!!!

Posts: 5994 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: looking for my rainbow
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 9:35 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Allgood and nofun,

I used to be a "deer in the headlights" guy when the emotional barrage was too much. 1. it does not sound as though you are brow beating them, and 2. I changed and they can too if it is important enough to them.

Sorry

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 12:29 PM, August 11th (Wednesday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
Paper Roses
♀ Member
Member # 19336
Default  Posted: 10:41 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No fun, Good for you for talking to him and being vulnerable, even though it causes you pain. You are right he is not likely to change, ats did and my H did, but I believe they are the exception and not the rule.

My H really was a lot like Mr. No fun a few years ago, even a year ago and he is now very compassionate and sensitive. He also has boundaries now and has matured beyond my wildest expectations...he was awful..just awful towards me and I so know what you are going through!

The reason I say that Mr. No Fun is not likely to change is that I did not expect my H to change either but there is always that one chance in a million. I do know that I had to be very firm with him and I had to make it clear to him that he would have to shape up or I would leave him..in order for him to be willing to make the changes that he made. I think as long as they believe that they do not have to change they will not.

Allgood, same words from me, be firm and expect a lot from him, otherwise he will not give a lot.

Miracle, Maybe I do trust myself, maybe I just know too much.

My H is a very powerful person and he desires to be a good person more than anything. He is able to decieve himself and has done so into believing that which he wishes to be the truth..even when it was not the truth.

This caused me very much pain as his lies to himself then became his lies to me and I could not discern the difference. Because when someone believes their own lies..they are very convincing indeed.

Since he is capable of this, I will always wonder if my perception is of THE TRUTH or if it is of what he believes to be THE TRUTH at this moment in time.

I want to believe he has changed and has the ability to have overcome this tendency to be able to decieve even himself..but it is such an insidious thing that I fear...I will always fear..it's return.

Does this make any sense?

As of this writing...as of this moment..I believe he is sincerely trying to be a good and honest husband, sincere in his desire to love and cherish me. I do not know though, what lurks underneath, as his desire to be that husband, could be so strong, that he might have repressed a secret part of himself that is now waiting to come back around at a later time to announce his inability to carry on the facade of being that husband..you see?

I was introduced to these confusing parts of him after d-day.

I discovered that although there were very sincere aspects to him that always wanted to be married to me..there were also very determined aspects that obviously wanted to destroy our marriage and sought other women's company for years!

I do not really know what happened to all of these "parts" of him and I wonder...sometimes..if they might appear again...I wonder..if it is just plain foolish of me to think that they will not?


Me-50-FBW-
He-45-FWh- sober 4 years

Self-deception- is literally a matter of deceiving oneself- and thus raises unique questions.
How can one deceive himself-unless he already knows-what it is that he is deceiving himself about?


Posts: 623 | Registered: Apr 2008 | From: Los Angeles
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 10:54 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well this has been the dysfunctional week. Tonight FWW and I talked and she explains she had a revelation today. For the last week, she has been angry with me and upset that I did not “get it”. She was back to the thinking that yes, she had 4 year affair, but that I was responsible for the failed marriage. She did not understand why I was not ready to say we both were wrong let’s just move forward. She now says that she understands that while the M sucked for her, and she felt I was to blame, for me it was not a great M, but was what it was.

She has been mad at me and withdrawn for the last week because I did not “get it”. No wonder I have felt disconnected and ambivalent. So she has had this breakthrough and everything is supposed to be OK now. Granted, compared to some I am whining, but when can I trust her to be honest about her feelings?

Meanwhile, I typed up a full page of questions I still want answers to, and I am feeling manipulated. I am seriously thinking of suggesting a polygraph, I am sure that will not go over well.

[This message edited by atsenaotie at 6:33 AM, August 11th (Wednesday)]


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
njgal480
♀ Member
Member # 24938
Default  Posted: 11:25 PM, August 10th (Tuesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

ats...
it so difficult to need answers to questions and to have them stonewall you!
I know...
that is what is holding up my recovery and healing from this crap.
If my husband could just get over it and be able to calmly talk about the things that I need to talk about....then I think it would make me feel so much better, safer, calmer etc.
Yes, my husband is doing so many things right.
For example,he is NOT ever on porn sites...NOfun..that was one of my demands after d-day. No porn ever. No social networking sites for him and definitely NO contact of any kind with the OW!
so.. he keeps to all of those ...he is there for me every minute of every day.
But, the one thing that he will no longer do is talk about the affair.Not at all.
and tonight... my asking a few very mild questions about how other male co-workers felt about the MOW/drinking buddy...
well..it did not end well.
He was screaming and I was crying. Now, we are in seperate rooms not talking.
Typical.
so..ats.. I definitely get why you are feeling so down.
My husband can at least use the excuse that it has been 3 and 1/2 yrs since d-day! Your wife doesn't have that excuse! Your d-day is much more recent.
But, what I always say...is yes, its been a long time since d-day...but, your affair went on even longer!

[This message edited by njgal480 at 11:27 PM, August 10th (Tuesday)]


Me- BS
Him- WH
Long term marriage
D-day- Jan. 2007
5 yr. LTA
Reconciled.


Posts: 3139 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: NJ
nofun
♀ Member
Member # 24546
Default  Posted: 6:36 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

njgal - I put so many demands on my H that he tells me he feels like he is under house arrest. Yet he has complied with every one of them and I told him if he doesn't like it, he knows where the front door is.

I never gave the computer a thought because he never used the computer until recently and only at work. He takes his notebook with him.

I was and am still hurt that he is still thinking of OW but I guess it's only natural. After all, he was with her for 12 years. He did not contact OW, so that's a good thing and I told him in no uncertain terms I would not put up with this BS. It has to stop NOW!!!

Just when you think things are going so well, the other shoe drops. Sometimes it's really too good to be true...

Paperroses - My H has changed some. He is kinder, more supportive, he's tried very hard to lose his moodiness, he includes me in everything he does now. There are other things I've asked of him which are harder for him such as opeining up about his feelings, being more affectionate. There are the things I don't think will ever change. Your H is certainly one in a million.

Well gotta go...I hear H mumbling....he probably needs me to put his pants on.....Grrrrr


BS (me) 56
WH 61
M 36 yrs
OW - 55 - Howdy Doody Look Alike
3 Awesome Adult C
DD 6/7/09
LTA 12 years.
Confused: D or R???

Posts: 987 | Registered: Jun 2009
atsenaotie
♂ Member
Member # 27650
Default  Posted: 6:37 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My husband can at least use the excuse that it has been 3 and 1/2 yrs since d-day! Your wife doesn't have that excuse!

She already uses the excuse that it was all so long ago. Eventually, it will be 3 1/2 years for us too. Will I still be bothered by my unanswered questions?

Plenty of fodder for IC this morning.

--Ats


LTA BS 53
FWW 60
M 1990, dday 10-5-09
Reconciled

Posts: 3968 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: FL
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 6:48 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

nofun... I'm glad you shared your feelings... "He never moved from his spot, never said another word.".. what you did was caught a deer in his headlights. I’m sure he felt troubled over what he did after you shared your feelings... For you both to have true intimacy, he now needs to learn to share his own feelings. If only he could have only responded. He obviously had some sort of yearning, craving, hankering to see an update. We cannot control his thoughts or feelings... they are what they are. I think he now gets it after you shared your feelings. He knows now that searching hurts you and you protected your boundary. He is with you now, not the OW. I bet he will try hard not to search again. It is not intentional that he wants to hurt you.

I'm thinking now you need to help him come out of his "feeling" shell. “why would he change?” He can change. But he won’t without making a decision to change. He is not sharing his feelings. He does not know how? He does not feel safe with you. And you are too afraid to seek a way for both of you to change and learn a new method of intimacy, communication, and commitment. Ask him to go to Retrouvaille! You both are in a good place to go right now.

Ya know? when we first meet someone, have you ever noticed how we often are inquisitive, share stories, share feelings? Then as we learn the values of that person, learn who that person is, we don’t always continue to share things. Let me give you an example. If I know my friend thinks Obama is the savior to this country by taxing and I think taxing more is just going to trickle down an hurt us all.. We both won’t move on that opinion because we both strongly think our position is right, the we avoid talking about it because we are afraid feelings like anger may take over the relationship. So we protect our relationship by shutting down.

What if your H would have been kind enough to really share his feeling? IT’s hard to know what the heck he was yearning. If it was me, it might have been intimacy and sex. What if he would have said the following… Nofun, I need the feel of you soft body next to mine. The beauty of your body gives me great pleasure and a huge sense of happiness. When we make love 2 or 3 times a week, It gives me the feeling I am of value… I am wanted. I need this every couple days. I need you to come home and have your lips touch mine… It is 9 on a scale of 10. It might feel the same as that time you wanted that hot red convertible, but my salary couldn’t afford it, so all we did was window shop it…

Nofun.. You are no failure! YOU had the courage to tell him your feelings about his latest yearning. YOU are the one that is now bring your relationship back like it was when you first met by sharing all. Keep doing it! It was never your choice to betray God, your family and yourself. He was the failure. It is now up to you to continue to seek, work hard and find your own happiness. It will be with him, or without him.

YOU want intimacy, closeness, YOU go get it… Tell him you want the intimacy back. Tell him you need it, you need to feel safe, you need commitment, you need a changed man that can share EVERYTHING with you.. you need a partner, a spouse not afraid to tell you everything.. no matter how he thinks it will make you feel. Tell him you are willing to pardon him of all his errors because you realize humans fail. Tell him, YES, I will never forget, I will always have deep hurting feelings.. You cannot control feelings as they are what the are.. Tell him you can and will reconnect with him on the deepest level but it is also up to him. Tell him you can take whatever he dishes to you… Those are just some of my thoughts and opionions.. I hope you keep moving toward peace.

Too all the LTA… Frankly, as much as I have promoted Retrouvaille, I am miffed at the fear everyone has of this program. What the heck are you scared of? Is it the cost? I have given money to our local program since my W and I completed the program to help those that cannot afford to go. They do not charge to go if you cannot afford it. It has helped me more then my W. And AST.. it might have been me that did need to change in our relationship.. I was the one that had no idea how to share my feelings. My W needed me to share myself! YES, I admit it.. I was at some fault in our M not being what it could be. True, I was a good faithful husband and father, but I missed in the feelings department.

Oh well enough of my preaching…

http://www.retrouvaille.org/

[This message edited by trynhard at 9:14 AM, August 11th (Wednesday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
njgal480
♀ Member
Member # 24938
Default  Posted: 7:43 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Tryin...I hear you on Retrouvaille...I would go in an instant. I will ask husband again. Don't think he would go unless I had a total meltdown... threatened to leave or left...
he is convinced that all is good-we are reconciled. The past is behind us.


Me- BS
Him- WH
Long term marriage
D-day- Jan. 2007
5 yr. LTA
Reconciled.


Posts: 3139 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: NJ
trynhard
♂ Member
Member # 22698
Default  Posted: 8:31 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

njgal480... I often think about you nj and what you did right after dday. I kinda wish I had done the same at times... S for 6 months or so... I may have been able to see what it was like on my own and see if my W would have wanted to R after that... wanting to R after S does prove something. Some doubts come up in my despite doing well right now... Sometimes I think my W would have been forced to leave her job... OM may not have left his W and family. It would have been a tough position.

Anyway, You might want to look at Marriage Encounters. Retrouvaille is for someone about to D... or thinking about D alot.

True, you cannot control what others will do or not do. But if you asked in a way to say it will help yourself.. and it will.

I had to ask my W several times. I explained that I need this for me.

Peace to all..

[This message edited by trynhard at 9:03 AM, August 11th (Wednesday)]


Posts: 2636 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Indiana
old dipstick
♂ Member
Member # 25598
Default  Posted: 9:05 AM, August 11th (Wednesday), 2010View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

m3. I am glad you liked the phrase. By all means add it to your collection. You might let us in on some of what you have in your collection. Please. I think you should teach Babby Paddy to say " I am up to my ass in alligators" and "I am busier than a cat covering up shit." I think this could prove to be beneficial to her when she starts preschool.

miracle/Columbo. You have figured out my business. Gators and cats.

tryn. You just keep getting better at this advice business. It also appears that you are getting better all around.

ats. It is all so confusing isn't it? Hang in there. You will get better.

Allgood. So you and miracle are going to fly away? Who is the pilot?

Hugs to the tribe.


Her WW 60
Me BH 60
M 36 yr
D-day#1 fall of 76 OM#1 2NS
D-day#2 summer of 89 OM#2 LTA 8 yrs OM#3 Short Term A


Posts: 751 | Registered: Sep 2009
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