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Newest Member: PhoenixWife (43212)

Wayward Side Post Reply     Print Topic    
User Topic: Things that every WS needs to know
libertyrocks
♀ Member
Member # 38924
Default  Posted: 4:53 PM, June 24th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks so much! Going to print this and give it to my H.


Me-BW 35. STBXH-35,active alcoholic, suspected NPD SA. 2 little boys. M 6yrs T13.
Year+ false R & TT from Dday1 Nov 2012 IEA - Feb 2014 count at 10 OW PA's 1LTA (all W lied to) for 3 years that I know of.
Filed for D.

Posts: 816 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: So Cal, baby. :)
PauLLing
♂ New Member
Member # 39396
Default  Posted: 6:04 AM, June 27th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WS here - 6 months into this terrible agony I inflicted upon us.

I was directed to this post when BS first discovered SI and I have re-read it many times. It helps me see more clearly the complete devastation I have wrought upon us and makes me so ashamed I did this.

I totally embrace all of what is in the original thread and it inspires me to be the better person my BS so deserves - I feel unworthy of the effort she has put in to wanting us to stay together but I am determined to repay that effort many times over - this thread has, and will continue to, inspire me.

Thank you SI for helping us cope with this horrific journey.


Me: fWH 49
Her: BS 46
PA: June to September 2013
Dday: January 3rd 2013 - I confessed
Status: Totally committed to R - having IC for the first time in my life which is uncovering so many bad, learned behaviours & we have seen a fabulous MC too.

Posts: 6 | Registered: May 2013 | From: UK
stilllovinghim
♀ Member
Member # 29971
Default  Posted: 12:56 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumped for Whatnow999


“You have a choice. Live or die.Every breath is a choice. Every minute is a choice. Every time you don't throw yourself down the stairs, that's a choice. Every time you don't crash your car, you re-enlist.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Survivor

Posts: 1933 | Registered: Oct 2010
OldCow18
♀ Member
Member # 39670
Default  Posted: 7:26 PM, July 17th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Amazing. Just printed for WH. Seriously AMAZING.


Me, BW forty something, DD & DS,
Married to WH (48) 10 years, together 15
D-Day 6.8.13
D-Day #2 9.6.13 Broken NC/TT
D-Day #3 10.23.13 "Full Disclosure"
WH having PA with MW coworker 3.13-6.13

Posts: 620 | Registered: Jun 2013
SurprisinglyOkay
♀ Member
Member # 36684
Default  Posted: 3:59 PM, July 19th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


FWS me 36 (recovering addict)
BS him 39
Together 7 years
2 children


"Your secrets keep you sick"


Posts: 1105 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: 221B
Rebuildingman
♂ New Member
Member # 39861
Shocked  Posted: 10:29 AM, July 21st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am a WS and one week post D-Day. I was visiting prostitutes and even another male (a BIG mistake) and got caught. Wife found texts and emails and you all know what happened.

We are talking right now and will start counseling on Monday. In the past week, I have cut of all contacts with previous life, have seen a therapist twice, saw our Priest twice, made a long and complete confession, been to a separation support group, and will be attending Kings Men tonight. I am completely devastated by what happened and have completely lost my friends, family members, and even my business as we worked together and we agreed that I would exit the business.

I am looking at Mount Everest now and don't know if I can do it. I love her dearly and the kids all want us to make it work as do I. But the challenges just seem too much for me and the thought of years of devastation, rejection, and pain are making me want to run away. I have God in my life and have turned it all over to Him, but still am a mess.

Of course it is all my fault, I accept and embrace that completely and have also accepted the fact that I am the lowest form of dirt for having done this.

Any words of encouragement is sorely needed at this point - not that I deserve any.


I am a rebuilding man - a work in progress

Posts: 4 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Stow
BaxtersBFF
♂ Member
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 10:35 AM, July 21st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

People are able to make changes. Making those changes stick long term is a bit more of a challenge.

Rather than look for support on this thread, you would be better off posting new threads, responding to others from your perspective, and responding to questions in posts you make. That way you won't threadjack this long-running thread.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6047 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
SandAway
♀ Member
Member # 37775
Default  Posted: 8:54 AM, July 27th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


fWW
BH Tred
M 16yrs
DDay Nov. 2011

Guns don't kill people; Affairs kill people


Posts: 404 | Registered: Dec 2012
Unagie
♀ Member
Member # 37091
Default  Posted: 12:56 PM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Heartbroken madhatter trying to rebuild

No longer together

Do not let others be your reference for who you see in the mirror.

Stop allowing people to hurt you, because you don't love you enough to walk away.


Posts: 2378 | Registered: Oct 2012
Danntonio
♂ Member
Member # 40065
Default  Posted: 11:53 PM, July 30th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you.......I intend to make this better...I love my wife...I love her so much...I have hurt her and our families....I am going to try and make this better.....I am so sorry


WH 49 trying to get help
BS 45 trying to help her
D-Day 2013-07-25

Posts: 88 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Alberta, Canada
Danntonio
♂ Member
Member # 40065
Default  Posted: 11:18 AM, August 3rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Already Read this a couple times...it is worth it to print and read again and again. Thank you


WH 49 trying to get help
BS 45 trying to help her
D-Day 2013-07-25

Posts: 88 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Alberta, Canada
myperfectlife
♀ Member
Member # 39801
Default  Posted: 10:51 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13

Posts: 452 | Registered: Jul 2013
tired girl
♀ Member
Member # 28053
Default  Posted: 8:38 AM, August 22nd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Me43 Him 43 Hardlessons DS 24,22,20
D Day 1/18/10 his 3/8/2012 mine
Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth”
― Pema Chödrön

Posts: 3663 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: az
Fireflies
♀ Member
Member # 40210
Default  Posted: 8:08 AM, August 25th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping for Nicnac


Me: BS
Him: WS

Posts: 72 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Grr Argh
Aubrie
♀ Member
Member # 33886
Default  Posted: 2:14 PM, August 28th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


Me - FWW * Him - QuietStand

"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne

"You can do it!" - R. Schneider


Posts: 5461 | Registered: Nov 2011
soconfusednow
♀ Member
Member # 40078
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I printed this for my WH to read.

Things still aren't where I'd like them to be yet, but at least they are better. He seams to finally understand part of what I'm going through.

I'm still very confused and unsure. not sure if we'll make it long term. But until that decision is made, I'm claiming baby steps towards our future together.


D-Day January 2013
prior EA in the 90's
me 50
WH 52
NC-several
last broken NC 7/2013 (hopefully)
Married 29 years
2 kids
Want to believe it's over, but is it really? Will I ever trust again?

Posts: 271 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
1bigidiot79
♂ Member
Member # 40557
Default  Posted: 9:06 AM, September 5th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OK so my internet filter won't let me see the first page of this thread so I can't read it. Can someone copy and paste it for me or PM me a copy of it?

Thanks


DDay 7/23/13
TT on 3/5/14 - Finally came completely clean
Finally working on making real changes in my life, one day at a time.

Posts: 133 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: United States
soconfusednow
♀ Member
Member # 40078
Default  Posted: 1:54 AM, September 9th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


D-Day January 2013
prior EA in the 90's
me 50
WH 52
NC-several
last broken NC 7/2013 (hopefully)
Married 29 years
2 kids
Want to believe it's over, but is it really? Will I ever trust again?

Posts: 271 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
LosferWords
♂ Guide
Member # 30369
Default  Posted: 3:11 PM, September 9th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Bumping this one to the top for a new member.

Posts: 4549 | Registered: Dec 2010
AFrayedKnot
♂ Member
Member # 36622
Default  Posted: 6:09 PM, September 15th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

bump


BS 39
fWS 36 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better. Reconciled from the A's but still working hard for a better tomorrow.
"Knowing is half the battle"

Posts: 2419 | Registered: Aug 2012
Topic Posts: 383
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