I have prepared taxes for years. Please keep in mind that if you go to H&R Block they will do the taxes, it will show your full refund at the time. Once it gets e-filed, you will then get notice of any monies taken out. My advice to you, save the $200-$400 that you would pay H&R block and check your state for free help with your taxes. Or you can use H&R block online for free, it is not hard. Any money owed for CS will be taken anyway, so it would be best not to have to pay all that money to HR block. PM me if you have any questions or need some assistance.
[This message edited by BMC0415 at 4:02 PM, February 21st (Saturday)]
I agree 100% with BMC. Do it yourself if you can. You can also you taxact.com - the only charge is to file state - $15 I think. Just file like normal and the state will send you a notice that they will be withholding all or part of your refund for a debt.
Yesterday OW decided to drop into FWH work, and give him a valentines card with the twins hand prints outlined, Oh just how cute, and said We love you daddy.. To the best daddy in the world. WTF. Then she wanted to let him know that she is now using the daycare right next door to his work, so now she will call him when she takes the boys and picks them up, so he can come help her take them in and pick them up. Because getting to babies out at once is difficult.
WTF.. Sorry but I believe this another one of her attempts to stear things up again, between FWH & I. I know he has no feelings for her any way like that any longer, & that he really never did have deep feelings for just was hoping she could fill something in him, he has not figured out what that is.
I just don't know how to handle this, we go to court in less than 3 weeks, but 3 weeks, with this is gona be tough, and he really doesn't get to see them that much, their are just starting teething, and standing, I really don't want him to miss out on them, but darn it, I just don't trust her alterior motive.
Do any of you have a suggestion to this, I will bring it up in counceling, but I don't want to keep him from seeing them..
Dreamer my suggestion, don't rock the boat before court. Like it or not this is going to be a test of your H to see if he can keep his word and if you a really working towards R. Best thing to do is be up front and make sure that the boundaries are clear.
If he is going to help get the OC into and out of the daycare, that is all he is to do, nothing more. I don't know if you can handle it, but I say just don't let your guard down. Once the judge decides visitation and cusstody, you will have a clearer idea of what you are dealing with in this situation.
I will be thinking of you.
My H and our kids are going to his home state in August for a week. I encouraged him to go, it has been 8 years since he saw his family. He begged me to go to but it's where the A took place and I just can't do it I don't worry that anything will happen and we are keeping the trip a secret from anyone there who doesn't HAVE to know so OW doesn't find out. But just the thought of him even being in the same state as her make me want to . You would think 12 years later that I would be further along in my recovery than this It's going to be a long 6 months and an even longer week while H and the kids are gone
I can understand the feelings of anxiety that you are feeling. You know when something tramatic happens to us it doesn't matter how long ago it may have been, it is still there.
Who knows by August you might feel a little stronger and want to make the trip, but if not that is ok too. (Thinking of you as always)
I'm sure after a little while I will calm down. I'm sure if the adoption were final or even underway for that matter, it wouldn't bother me so much. I also worry that my H family will spring OC on him. The only thing that is keeping me calm about that is the fact that by the 3rd week in August when they take thier trip, the kids out west will be back in school.
On one hand nothing changes, H just keeps paying CS and we go on living our lives. On the other hand I was so looking forward to this being over with Oh well it will either be over with in 6 more years when OC is 18 or when they get around to the adoption, neither is soon enough for me
Well, if it is meant to be it will happen. We can still celebrate just being alive, it is a great thing!
First I am so sorry that you found out that way! It must have been very devestating. I want to welcome you to our group.
First let me ask, did your H have a DNA done or OW just named him as father? Very important. I would also be concerned about this because it looks as though she has filed for CS or the state has. Find out the laws in the state you live in and find out if you can file for CS while still living with your H.
While deciding on whether to stay in your marriage or leave is important, because you have small children and it seems as though there is some legal action going on here, you have to gear up and take care of your COM and yourself. Please check pg. 9 of this thread there are some suggestions on what to do to protect your family in this situation.
Again, only you know what you are willing to accept and it is going to take some time to decide that, however to protect your kids, you need to take some action now.
If you need extra support or just need to talk, please pm me.
I will be thinking of you. So sorry.
dzas, I am so sorry for you that you found out this way, but a paternity test really is the best advice ever.