I get to see my son, at the whim of my XWW. All together at most 16 hours a month and that was the best month... Hes 5 1/2 months old, yep see got pregnant the night before #2DDay by DNA proof positive mine. I was well on the way of a 10 year M, had forgiven my WW 5 years before. Tryed for kids with Artifical Insemention (spl.)
So now I got to deal with that. I love my son, have close to 10,000 pictures of him from the day after he was born. I swear he sits in a car seat almost all the time, his head has a list, he can't sit up straight at all, falls right away to the same side. I been through alot of parenting classes over the last nine months to tell me this isn't right. My XWW is still claiming she is breast feeding. Like I can't get medical records. Her milk never came in...
[This message edited by TwiceTorn at 11:35 PM, May 18th (Sunday)]
Yes I have custody. She moved out and under no certain circumstances was I going to let her take our child and destroy everything else that was normal for him. His bed is here, His school is here, his friends are here.
I told her, point blank, it would be insane to even think about moving him to her month to month apartment and new school just so she can avoid any guilt she might have.
She is allowed very liberal visitation with over night stays. I am by no means attempting to alienate her from her son or keep the two apart. However, she made her bed and has to live with her decision to leave home. We continue to go to school functions, baseball games, football games etc, life is as normal for him as possible.
Still there are times when she blows him off to her her own thing and he will eventually catch on to that. Her time with him will be further limited as he grows up and would rather go do cool stuff with friends than have to go see Mom (or be with Dad either).
Regarding your situation. Breast feeding or not she can pump milk and it is OK to substitute formula for a feeding or two. My wife breast fed as well and couldn't produce enough to keep him fed, we subbed formula regularly. Unless there is a viable reason to keep the baby home, she doesnt have a leg to stand on. I would simply ask her to allow you a regular schedule or you will have to ask the court for one. Assure her that you can do everything required to care for a baby.
He is as much yours to care for as hers.
[This message edited by TurnipTruck at 12:09 AM, May 19th (Monday)]
As it turns out, the wife of my ex's OM contacted me this past week. She's been in the dark the whole time. I gave her all the information she needs to make an informed decision.
But in the middle of that, I found out that my ex had illegally accessed my e-mail account and had all my e-mails forwarded to her personal account. Comcast verified this to me today. They left her on the account by mistake and she called up and asked for my password and they gave it to her.
It never ends. Obviously, I have legal rights to go after her for this, but I don't wish to see the mother of my child in jail. It is just frustrating dealing with this ongoing bullshit.
This'll be a handshake & a shoulder slap.
Like droppin an easy pop-up, & hitting a home-run in the same game, you got the OM's wife informed (the hr) & got your email invaded -
o crap. I would HATE that man!
You've fixed it by now, no doubt.
Still, move on to the next inning.
Course, I'm in the dugout saying, 'why not do a squeeze on her' -
but I think it's better to stick to fundamentals & move on.
She isn't worth the sweat off my balls to be honest, the effort to go after her is more than I want to invest. She dug her own hole, let her wallow in it, thinking she got away with something. What goes around comes around...
[This message edited by hurts at 11:45 AM, May 24th (Saturday)]
Anyway, just too much crap inside and not finding any relief.
We do live in the women first society when it comes to child rearing. As Males our influence is not even a blip in the radar. It sucks I have to fight tooth and nail to see my son for however brief it is. But I got lots of fight left, because Im doing what is right. None of us should be put in such a position. But here it is, live it best ya can. I havta, its all I got. I brush aside any of the comments my XWW says, like how her new BF is such a much better father to my son than I can be... Fuck that its not his son.
Part of me says take my son and run, raise him myself, he would be so much better off. But I can't because im so much better than that... Talk about a big moral delema... I wish I could bury my conscience like she can at times...
Anyway, I would be lost without my son. He is my life. I cringe at the thought of him having to deal with the split families like his sibs. It is just not fair.
I know I may start thew fight but I feel like I will lose my ass in court. I don't have a great track record there and I am not in the best of places for male rights.
As you say, part of life.
That is plainly the last straw with this BITCH! Im going to file a lawsuit for the value. I know damn well she sold it outta spite because I said she could use it to mow the lawn.
And keep a close record of everything. She is going to take it out on you with the boy, keep close records and make sure you document it all.
I do find it strange, and totally just strange women, and some men reacted to my post in N/B. Why I would charge my SO rent on a house I bought. Is it so strange to throw up that boundry, of I will not be put back at square one again?! Its my money, my investment.
that she GAVE to her side-pieceOS!
Yeah, trigger me timbers mofo!
Take my shit. Take it all! I got a broke-down pressboard desk that was sitting in the house when we moved in, 2 chairs, my books, a bookshelf, & oh! a bed that has seen 2 fucking cheating wives bangin asses.
Thank God I'm not God! The population on this planet would be instantly reduced by about fucking half.
And here I am - comparing fucking scars.
Like welds make parent metal stronger,
so the scars knit shit too.
I think in self-preservation, my mind thinks alot of later, & the end of things -
when cards and mowers and the world burns.
By then I will have been nakedly examined,
atom by atom.
The creator's light pinning me like a moth.
My own little black-spots of sin.
I hope they're covered in blood,
and that light, that penetrating light, recognizes itself when it finally gets around to seeing my heart,
and says; "Hey, I know you, come on. Come with me. And by the way, here's your new name!"
What will it be like for them then? The card-clutchers. The mower and child-stealers?
I will think of that, and try to become more patient with my lot. Look forward with hope, & yeah,
My SO was with me when we picked my son up... So once we got my son in the car and underway the conversation begain. I and my SO think she got beat up by her BF. It makes perfect sense given her attitude, long clothing, hat and black eye. I just hope my son wasn't exposed to it.
I swear she picks losers for BF's. Its her picking method of picking random guys off the internet, sending lewd pictures and stories. I did notice the lawn was getting long at her house again, guess the BF didn't mow it.
On one hand I feel good she desearved whatever she gets. But on the other, why the heck doesn't she just get help, deal with her issues to move on? Probibly never to be honest, sad some people are like that. It sucks my son is exposed to that.