This was not my choice, but it will not be my undoing either. ~~yewtree
I've been on such a rollercoaster of emotions, but I've never really broken down. I haven't cried, haven't screamed, nothing. I'm really worried that one day soon I'm just going to crack. Am I still in shock?
you mean you've never cried? WOW! I can't help myself - all these hormones and stuff. I don't know if you're in shock or just too busy with the new baby and everything to take some time for your feelings to register. How are you getting through this?
Welcome to the new members sorry to find you in this thread but glad you found us.
I am doing a little better we actually picked names now. I have about 7 weeks to go hoping things will get better either before or after the birth. I haven't done anything yet though no crib up, baby clothes still need to be gone through ect ect.
Sending hugs to all the members in this thread think we could all use it.
My due date is Aug 12 via C-section so I expect delivery around the 4th. We don't know what the sex is they won't tell here due to cultural issues.
Maybe that's it -- I'm just numb? I don't have any other explanation.
I'm due July 20th, It's going to be my second boy and I am having a c-section (or so planned...) Haven't decided on a name yet...
Trying to get through things...
Our continuous issue is money. Wednesday, he was going to take care of everything; no need for welfare he said; I'll have a check to you by Friday,he said. Friday, no check...it'll be there tomorrow; he also said that he'll do what he needs to to help me get welfare; he did drop off some cash though. When I asked him about it, he said that I'm not satisfied with anything. That's not it, I believe that if you say something, you should have some follow through. He's never had it before, why would I expect it now. He's quit me just like everything else in his life.
He's taking our daughter today for father's day. Please help me get through this. It's like the beginning of the visitations now.
I was 5 months pg with #5 when I had found out about my FWH's EA. Hurt like hell. I lost it. The day after her birth, it ALL came flooding back. She is supposed to be out last baby and I get to look back on all that! Before I found out he didn't even want our daughter (and a few of the other kids). Although we are reconciled, I feel like he owes me and that I deserve another chance to have a happy pregnancy. I want more children and he doesn't but I feel that he should suck it up and give me what I want. Wrong line of thinking I know. Has anyone ever felt like that??
I am so sorry this is happening to you. I wish for all of us on this board to just have the ability to forget what has been going on. It would be so much easier to just focus on having our babies. I guess I am kind of lucky. My fiance is literally thrilled to become a father. He is getting scared though because the time is coming lol. When he is at work (he works nights), he constantly checks up on me to see if I am ok. I think he's worried that one night he will go into work and I'll go into labor!
Affairs are hard enough without being forced into having the joy that you should feel with a pregnancy/baby being tainted by all this. It makes me so sad to see all of you that have been robbed of so much by the thoughtless actions of your husbands.
I'm an old member of this group. I just wanted to share a brief look at my story and what did happen to me after the pregnant and betrayed part of my life.
I did have D-day while I was pregnant with my son. Hit like a ton of bricks and hurt so bad. I lost weight, felt disconnected to my child, and completely cheated out of my pregnancy and being happy and all that goes with it. Why couldn't my husband just CHERISH me while I was carrying his child. Why throw me away and treat me like dirt?
My husband decided to leave a few weeks after d-day. He did a fake R. He just filed for divorce and left me alone in the house at 7 months. I had been alone anyways while he was out with his As but this time he had taken all his clothes out of the closet and up and left for good. I hurt so much and didn't care about myself. My baby was probably the only reason that I kept going. I kept saying it wasn't fair to him if I gave up too.
I ended up having my son alone. Being technically married but alone in the hospital was so surreal. Having a newborn by myself was so hard. I kept telling myself, it isn't suppossed to be like this. I could never wrap my head around why my XH chose a married older woman over us. Nothing I did... deserved what he did to me.. to our child.
So I hit the anger stage and it took about a year to divorce. My son was 8months old at that time when my marriage ended. My XH sent in child support but we got nothing else, no extras, no gifts, no nothing.
To make a long story short. I did meet someone wonderful. He's been a wonderful dad to my son and now we have a daughter together. I did get that dream pregnancy. My XH still doesn't get it. I am amazed how far I have come. We didn't miss my XH because he had never been around anyways. You can't miss what you never had!
Anyways, I'm sort of glad that things happened this way. I'm much more happier now than I was with my XH. It was a blessing in disguise. Now, looking back.. I wish I would have left the moment I found out I was pregnant. I would have left HIS A$$!!
Remember, everything happens for a reason. You might not see the big picture now but later on you might. In the end, if my XH was stupid enough to file for divorce and lose us and to treat my son and I so badly and to pick the OW over us .. then that was my sign that I couldn't go back to that nor raise my child with him. It was just too much.
I made it, and so can you! Love your babies!